Come meander with me on the pathless path of the Heart
in these anecdotal,
sometimes inspiring, sometimes personal meanderings of the Heart's opening in the every-day-ness of Life...

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Grocery Store Wisdom - Connection

I’ve been thinking a lot about connections lately, as in how people connect, and where, and why – or why not. It seems I am a “connector” of sorts. I like connecting with people, yet I don’t *need* to be connected. Maybe you have experienced this too…

In our fast-paced society it seems it is more difficult to find real connection. More and more people are turning to the Internet for connection, with Twitter and Facebook – for the 30 second sound bite connection. I was invited to join a Twitter this weekend. My husband has a Twitter page, so I had him log on as a follower so I could just see how this works. Interesting. The Twitter owner puts out some kind of statement that the “followers” read, and maybe offer a comment of their own. But where is the *connection*? There’s no real dialogue, it seems. I don’t Twitter, or is that Tweet, and I don’t have a Facebook page, or a My Space page, but I have enjoyed blogging. Blogging seems to have more depth to it. I love reading other people’s blogs, and writing my own, and knocking on someone else’s door to leave a comment, and inviting them over for a visit. There is an element of mystery in its ability to connect us, as you never *really* know whether you’ve really “connected” with anyone “out there.” It’s like writing into the Nothingness never knowing whether some planet out there is picking up your signal. Maybe it just goes zooming past Pluto out into deep space – the blogosphere – located in cyberspace... Sorry I don’t have directions for that, just follow everybody else as that seems to be where we’re all going anyway. :)

The grocery store is another kind of “space” that offers interesting connections. Kind of like the blogosphere. And so the noticing today while at the grocery store was about – you guessed it – connections! :)

I like the grocery store kind of connection. I can be personal, engaging, interactive, and I can go home. :) It’s connection without *connection* - as a Buddhist therapist once told me. It’s a place to go to feel connected with people, without the commitment of connection. In other words there’s no expectations and no *need* driven connection. It’s just connecting. You don’t have to commit to a long term friendship, try to make anything work, worry about hurt feelings, misunderstandings, and all the ups and downs of more connected kinds of connections, if that makes sense. Which is not to say that I don’t like deeper connections as well, I do. But in the connection without *connection* space I enjoy being present to people, engaging with them. The grocery store connection gives me a good opportunity to practice Presence – to step back from self and be aware, to notice and respond – to see the Beingness in others. Sometimes the connecting is instant and natural – not intentional – more spontaneous. There’s eye to eye contact with the clerks behind department counters with light banter and pleasant interaction. You *feel* a connection. You get to peer into their eyes and *see* who’s behind the persona. And others are just walking through the store with a veil over their eyes, not wanting to make connection. I’ve been one of those myself - especially today. After 3 grocery stores I still had an errand to do at the local department store, which took me longer than I had anticipated. The veil came down over my eyes, the blinders went on, and the do not disturb sign went up. I had had enough connections for the day and I just wanted to dis-connect. So I did. It was more of a protective mechanism than anything else; a response to the over stimulation, and a resulting retreat into inner Being connectedness.

And so it seems the little moments of connection are just as important as the deeper kind. We connect and then we’re gone - never knowing who we’ve touched, or how we’ve been touched by others in the moment. Some connections touch our hearts, others challenge our thinking, others open a door into seeing the larger Reality. Making little points of connection here and there through cyberspace, or in the grocery store, is a part of living - the interconnectedness of a collective shared experience on the spiral of life. And the ultimate grocery store wisdom is that all connections converge into One.

Heart Smiles – MeANderi


  1. I have a stubborn resistance to twitter and facebook and I'm not entirely sure why. There is something different about blogging. In a way it feels like an offering and as you say it just goes out there and there is something I like about that. Even if no one reads it, for me it has been worthwhile, the writing of the post has helped me in some way.

    I also feel uncomfortable about the level of crafts & arts self promotion that I understand these venues are used for. In my mind they are social networking sites and not advert venues, so I would not feel good about using them in this way.

    Maybe I'm just too old and cranky but I don't see these places as adding anything to my life, rather they feel like they might just use time better spent elsewhere.

    that's my tarnished two cents worth!

  2. Hello ZenDotStudio!

    Yes, I have felt the same with blogging - it has benefited me in the writing of it. And I find I am inspired from reading other's blogs, such as yours (and Megs). T & FB are definitely social networking sites, that evidently have found a following for reasons that elude me. They are used to gain more traffic, to get more exposure. I'm amazed at how many "spiritual teachers" are twittering! I can't imagine that they actually sit there and send out brief comments, even if they're of a spiritual nature. But I guess these sites serve a purpose in the scheme of things - offering some kind of "connection." But they're not my cup of tea... I mean does anybody really care about the minutia of my life? I'd much rather be doing something creative...

    In celebration of "crankiness" :)

    And thanks Meg for your comment :)

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