Come meander with me on the pathless path of the Heart
in these anecdotal,
sometimes inspiring, sometimes personal meanderings of the Heart's opening in the every-day-ness of life...

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Wave Movements ~ ~ ~

There is a “phenomenon” that occurs whenever I go through major life changes. I experience an incredible wave of profound peace that is unexplainable and beyond comprehension before the event; as if I am being “gifted” by The Beloved’s Presence in a tangible way. I should know by now that there is something coming when I feel this peace that is beyond understanding. It happened before my husband got the job in Minnesota, and it happened again last Tuesday, the day he found out that he had been let go. It’s as if it creates a cushion or buffer for what is to come. Maybe this is Grace. Of course these are only words that describe the feeling. Why this happens I have no idea… Neither do I need to know. It just occurs and I accept it, am grateful for it, and note that I wish I could feel like this all the time. It is like being consciously aware of the bliss of Being.

At some point after a major event, there is also a wave of sadness and grief that comes. It showed up today. I have also come to accept this wave; to not interpret it, judge it, resist it, avoid it, but to allow myself to experience it as part of the ebb and flow of living, and ride its wave. It’s uncomfortable at first. I bobble around on the wave, enduring the tempest, gasping for air, until I eventually recognize it as just another wave of life’s movements – oh yeah, here you are again – and surrender. I have learned over the years to simply sit with this wave, in silence. There’s nothing that can be applied to make it better. It cannot be stopped. So I just sit with it in the quiet space of the Heart, until it recedes…

When I finally sat down with sadness mid afternoon today, befriending it, I found peace there too. It just had this covering of molasses all over it… I noticed that it loves to be met – this sadness – as well as the peace within it. It’s like Peace meeting the molasses of feelings is peace. It’s Peace meeting Peace in a different form. When whatever the feeling is is met with acceptance, there is only peace.

Every movement, every wave of life is a movement of the Ocean of Being - of Peace. There cannot be movement, there cannot be a wave *except for* the movement of the vast Ocean of Being – of Pure Awareness – of The Beloved. Everything that occurs, occurs within and as this Ocean of Being. In this there is peace.


Picture ~ The Great Wave off Kanagawa
Katsushika Hokusai

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Remembering Who "I" is...

“I” is a silent stream of Liquid Life,
a silent stream of Cosmic Light

~ reverberating unendingly ~

”I” is the golden thread
that weaves ItSelf
into the fabric
of Reality…

~ fluidly ~

~ timelessly ~


“I” is the Cosmic Heart,
beating Its Rhythm of Love
through Its own Vastness…

~ undulating ~

“I” is the wave ~ and ~ the ocean,
the manifest ~ and ~ un-manifest,
thought ~ and ~ pre-thought…
“I” is the ebb ~ and ~ flow
of life being lived

~ freely ~

“I” is





just Ising…


Just listen…

Can you hear It?

The silent sound
like a silent stream
whispering ~

Remember Me…

“I” is “You” ~


Mystic Meandering
April 2011

istock photo

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Heart Whispers...

Put your ear to the wall of your heart…
Listen to the whisper of knowing there.
Love will touch you if you are
very still…

Tom Barrett


There is a whisper,
but it’s louder than the wind.
It calls to us, “Come Home.
The story is over,
the pages are worn thin.
Come Home.”

It’s like a chant,
a sacred OM
underlying all else.

It requires no doing anything,
or going anywhere
or becoming anything.

If only we see that we are this
whispering sound,
all else will dissolve
into peace.

Rafael Stoneman


Make everything in you an ear,
each atom of being,
and you will hear
at every moment
what the Source
is whispering
to you…

You are the beloved
of The Beloved…

and in every moment,
in every event of your life,
The Beloved
is whispering to you
exactly what you need
to hear and know…



istock photo

Friday, April 8, 2011

Finding Peace in the Practical

I started de-cluttering, cleaning and organizing the house this week. This is going to take a while, with so much clutter accumulated – I’m ashamed to say. It’s a bit daunting when I *think* about what needs to be done here, because of what *hasn’t* been done here. But I am re-reading Byron Katie’s A Thousand Names for Joy before I go to bed each night, which is reminding me again of how my mind is creating my stress about it, because I am once again *believing* my thoughts. I have known this and forgotten this a thousand times. So now I’m aware when those dangerous thoughts arise that tend to send me into overwhelm, when I look at the basement, the garage, the garden, and my work space. I started in my work space Monday, then today for some reason I spontaneously moved to the garden, even though the work space is not finished – just allowing myself to spontaneously move to the next task at hand. And this afternoon went back to the work space again for a couple of hours.

I am finding a strange sense of peace in the mundane. Monday I was working at the mess at the desk when I suddenly awared that even as a myriad of thoughts passed through this mental mechanism, I was at peace and internally still. What a delight it was to realize the sound of internal quiet and peace. I was simultaneously aware of an internal flow and rhythm that I knew had been there all along, but had been crowded out by the mind. The mundane gives my mind something to focus on. Being busy keeps me from clinging to the thoughts and getting totally lost in the “what ifs.” I just keep going with what life requires at the moment, and in doing so I find a sense of peace. I’m being in the moment, wherever the moment takes me. And no matter where that is, it’s always this moment; living moment-to-moment, seamlessly. Sweet peace.

I had this selfish idea that I would get my chance to live a “contemplative life” while hubby was away – a self-centered craving to live monastically, meditating a lot, reading, maybe get back to something creative, doing contemplative photography, spending time in nature – you know, life as a continual retreat – trying to find internal peace. But life isn’t unfolding that way. There are a lot of very practical, mundane things that are required at the moment. And I am surprised to find peace in the practical. I’m enjoying the solitude and beginning to find my stride actually.

I’ve always been the kind of person that wants to get the practical out of the way so I can enjoy life. Eeeeuuu – even that didn’t sound good to me – but that seems to be the pattern. Just get-r-done so that you can do what you want to do – like having to eat your peas and carrots before you can have dessert. (Although I love peas and carrots :) But now I’m discovering that life is not a la carte. There’s no separating life into different courses, no dividing life into time for mundane, time for meditation, but living life as a continuous fluid movement – Liquid Life. Somehow being genuinely busy (not creating busyness just to be busy, or avoid anything) has allowed me to see the fluidity and seamlessness of the day, of the moment, of one moment sliding into another – not just getting through the main course so I can get to the sweet dessert at the end…

I’ve also tried living life the other way – more contemplatively – avoiding the practical as much as possible, retreating into my familiar forms of “spirituality”, which is why there is so much clutter and cleaning to tend to now. So now I’m learning to live life on Life’s terms - the ebb and flow of living - doing what’s required – contemplatively – in silence and solitude – allowing my mind to go where it wants to go, while awareing the delight of the deep Silence within, whether meditating or not. Finding that I don’t need to meditate to “find” IT – as IT is ever-present, I just need to turn within and experience it – feel it, sense it, aware it.

This morning I awoke “knowing” that it’s all OM (why that particular word I have no idea). OM is everything and everywhere. Life is OM – the Divine Energy. Everything is IT and IT is everything. IT just is.

This is going to be an interesting experience…

“I am the experience of the eternal…
When you don’t believe your thoughts…
there’s no separation.
You’re everything.
Only the unquestioned mind
would believe that you’re an I
living inside a body.
…there’s no I to identify as…
take it all in as Being…
…the universe is wherever you are,
and it’s everywhere…”

Byron Katie
A Thousand Names For Joy


Saturday, April 2, 2011

'THIS' is enough...

When the story melts away,
and the stories always melt away,
all that’s left is:

~ ‘This’ ~

~ The Flame ~

The Light that is beyond light,
The Love that is beyond love,
The Life that is beyond life,

‘This’ that LIVES it all…

where all thought
and language
does not

Where ideas & stories

I Am-ness


There is only



in every moment,
however that moment is,
being whatever It Be-e-s

And you know
in your Heart that


Just ‘This’


Mystic Meandering
April 2011


“Once your awareness becomes a flame,
it burns up the identification
with the mind.”