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Thursday, August 27, 2009

Gone, Gone, Gone Beyond

Our Yodi Bodhi passed last night. And so I wanted to post this as a tribute and Memorial to him. This is a picture of him from maybe a year ago, or less, sleeping in the chair where he just about died last night.

He rallied in the last day or so and we thought maybe he had dodged yet another bullet in his long life – 18 and ½ years. But that was not to be, evidently. Yesterday he deteriorated rather quickly. I knew he was dying. I got to spend 2 hours just sitting with him and holding my hands on him in the living room where he lay. Thanking him for being here, for his life, and the light that he brought. I thought that was going to be it. But he lingered longer and moved himself behind the chair in the picture. We thought he would die there peacefully. We moved the chair and sat with him on the floor – waiting for the end. Sometime after 9pm he began to struggle, so we took him to the 24 hour animal hospital to have him euthanized.

And so he has moved on or dissolved back into the greater Ocean of Being.

Gone, Gone, Gone Beyond.

Gone from suffering to liberation.

Gone all the way to the other shore.

Our grief is beyond words. No matter how one spiritualizes, or philosophizes, or constructs formulas for dying, death is messy. There is nothing particularly “spiritual” about it. It’s a laborious process just like birth… And I am thankful that we got to be present to him through the process, as difficult as it was.

Yodi has returned to the Eternal.

No coming, no going

No after, no before

I hold you close to me

I release you to be free

We will miss you dearly. You were such a presence in our lives…

We love you!


  1. I hope Yoda is at peace. My thoughts are with the both of you. I hope yoda is having fun with the other beautiful animals in the great beyond. I'm sure you both will get to once again see your beloved yoda. Button is thinking of the both of you, and she sends her love and licks to you both.

    Love and Hugs
    Love Naomi and Button

  2. Thank you Naomi and Button for your beautiful, heartfelt message. We know Yoda is at peace. We appreciate your love & support. Heart Hugs to you! Christine

  3. I thought when I saw the title of your post that it might be your dear kitty. I do remember when our kitty of 13 years got sick over a 3 week period and had to be euthanized. I remember how shocked I was at the great depth of sadness we experienced over his death. How little things like coming in the back door with no little furry face there to greet us brought tears to our eyes. I was astounded at how much life a small furry being brings to a home, how a bumper sticker that said "the more people I meet the more I like my cat" made me cry profusely.

    So my heart is with you all and a prayer goes out for dear Yodi.

  4. Christine - I am so sorry for your loss. There are no words to console when you lose someone so dear, and so I offer you my heartfelt compassion. I assisted 2 elderly cats to the 'other side' last year, mine and a dear friend's, and it was a sorrowful but beautiful experience. What an honor to be able to do this, after having spent so many loving years with Yodi.

    Peace, peace.


  5. Thank you Carole for your kind words - that made me cry - which is a good thing. :) Yes, it's the little things that are showing up that remind me of the loss of his presence, which is what I'm really missing. His presence just filled this house, and it feels rather empty now. I resonate with the bumper sticker saying. Both my husband and I have commented that this has been harder than losing a parent. Thank you too for your prayers - they are appreciated. Christine

  6. Meg - thank you *so much* for leaving your heartfelt message of compassion and peace here. It touched my heart and brought new tears. But am glad for that. I was numb for the first day after, but the reality is sinking in. He had a difficult transition, so there is some guilt here as well, which I'm sure will linger for a while. But am glad he is free of his suffering at last. With gratitude for your warm words. They helped. Christine

  7. I am thinking of you both as your dear beloved Yoda has passed on.
    Your tribute to him was lovely. I can really feel his soft Siamese energy
    From the photo you posted. It is never easy to lose our dear friend.
    They are never with us long enough.
    Take good care of one another during this fragile time.
    My heart is with yours.

  8. Cindy - thank you so much for leaving this lovely message here. Your kind words are uplifting. I know that Bill really appreciates your support.
    With gratitude - Christine

  9. I am so sorry to hear this bit of news. Believe me, I know what grief there is in losing a favored pet.....sometimes I think more difficult than losing another person.

    There is something very special in having a pet and they are so loyal and faithful in their devotion.

    I can tell you that the pain will never go away, but it will in time become a dull ache. And then from time to time there will be reminders that will bring it all back again and I suppose that is not all bad either. After all, with no grief there would have had to have been a lack of real love and caring as well.

    This is what happens when we reach out and touch someone, even a pet.....someday there comes the pain. This is particularly true because you have given so much time and attention to this cat in the later years and weeks and days....yes, even hours.

    Take care.


  10. Don - thank you so much for your words of comfort here. We really appreciate them. And I know you can relate to the pain and grief. Yes, Yoda required a lot of attention in the past several years. With the pain there is also relief that it is finally over... We are all moving on, in a sense, into a new cycle of existence... With gratitude, Christine