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sometimes inspiring, sometimes personal meanderings of the Heart's opening in the every-day-ness of Life...

Friday, August 7, 2009

Blogger Blob

Hi I’m MeANderi and I am a blogger blob, and this is my first BB meeting. Being a blogger blob is kinda like being Sponge Bob Square Pants living in a different reality under the sea. I am definitely fixated on blogging, preoccupied, dare I say driven to write. It excites me. It’s my passion. But I began to notice I might have a problem when I had a 3 weekend binge on SSS, having to read and comment on 72 links! I had no idea what I was getting into, nor any idea when I started blogging back in June that a mere 6 weeks later I would need to enter rehab. I am so over stimulated with blogging, like a constant caffeine buzz, that it is effecting my sleep and my ability to enter a deeper place of Stillness in meditation… And I’m feeling a little punchy, in case you hadn’t noticed. :) I mean I’m seeing vegetables with eyes! (see yesterday's post below). I’ve been hijacked by the mind that is fixated on churning out ideas for blogs. Lovely service the mind is offering here, but I need to put that service on hold for a while… Should I be admitting this here, at my first meeting? Well I guess truth-telling is the first step to recovery…

Humor aside, the blogger blob needs a new perspective, needs deep rest, and a shift in consciousness.

Yesterday my husband left me a copy of an online article entitled “How to nap.” That was my intervention. It’s an article on the benefits of napping. Hmmm – interesting timing. Feeling a bit sleep deprived, I read the article with curiosity. It talks about the kinds of sleepers and when their nap times would be during the day, depending on whether you are a Lark (early to bed early to rise kind of person) or an Owl – bedding down at 1am or later and arising at 9am. That’s me! (and my husband). Our creative energies kick in later at night, and we often have to force ourselves to go to bed, with a resulting lag the next day.

According to the article an Owl’s afternoon “sleep gate” is around 3pm – the most beneficial time for our bodies and minds to take a nap. I love the word “sleep gate!” That got my attention. Is this like the existential doorway into Enlightenment?, the “gateless gate” in Zen? And where do I find this sleep gate? I guess at 3pm… The article goes on to talk about the most beneficial length of time for our “sleep gate” naps. A mere 20 mins yields a “stage 2” sleep, enhancing alertness and concentration. A nap of more than 45 mins (but evidently under 90 mins) may cause what the article calls “serious sleep inertia.” I don’t think I have that problem. And a 90–120 min nap includes the necessary REM sleep for complete restoration. I can’t imagine sleeping that long in the middle of the afternoon!

But it got me to thinking – maybe deep meditation has the same effect on our minds and bodies as deep sleep. By going into the space of deep internal stillness and resting in Awareness maybe we reset some kind of internal button, just like in sleep. It appears that meditation offers another kind of “gate” similar to the “sleep gate” where we can enter a place of Stillness and feel restored, where the mind can actually still to a slower pace, and the body can feel refreshed. I have experienced this many times. I’m sure someone somewhere has done studies on this. And when I am able to meditate just before bed I get a better night’s sleep. So instead of a power nap through the sleep gate at 3pm, I think I’ll indulge in a retreat through the gateless gate of inner Stillness.

Although I jest about all this blogging stuff, what I realize is that through this blogging experience I have been given a wonderful opportunity to just notice, to *see* that I have been hijacked by the mind into unconscious behavior again… So I’m taking the next few days off, cold turkey, to gain perspective, do some cocooning again and bring my attention back to the Embrace. (I need another “tea with ‘Z’”!) I’ll do some “process art,” or other right brain creative activities that always seem to open the gate to Stillness, allowing myself to Just Be. Ahhh – I’m already relaxing…

I’ll miss my blog friends, but I’ll be back… Gosh you’d think I was taking a long trip on a slow boat to China! Actually, I’m already *on* the boat, already immersing myself in rest and art. I can see the portal gate just ahead as we’re leaving the harbor. I’ll soon be entering Samadhi land – hopefully. But, before I go – I have a surprise already in the works for you for tomorrow, as part of my creative break. So be sure to visit tomorrow’s blog post for a special treat!

See you on the other side…

Heart Smiles – MeANderi

1 comment:

  1. This is a very funny post, Christine. I have to confess to feeling a bit obsessed about blogging when I first started. It's kind of like a love affair. At first you are smitten, you can't think of anything else. But as impermanence teaches us, this feeling transforms into other things. But there is both the tiring and energetic effect of "being smitten" don't you think. And as you point out it is an opportunity to practice; to watch what we do, how we run our energy. Ah it's always so interesting to see what we get up to. Here's to the "middle path" that's such an important idea in Buddhist practice.

    Happy zzzzz's to you!