In Preparation...

I received an article in the Non-Duality Highlights Newsletter and I thought I’d share an excerpt from it. For me it is a good reminder of how to “prepare” for this upcoming life experience – our “second journey” as B calls it. I find I’m not as prepared for this as I thought I would be. A myriad of emotions are flooding this system. This heart is not so brave after-all. Oh I have my “plan” of being a “pioneering woman”, independent, on my own, living a contemplative life, adventurous – pursuing art, photography, meditation, writing, as well as doing all the mundane things that need to be “caught up on” around here – paying attention to house and heart that have been neglected over the years. But the heart is not ready for a “pioneering life” yet. It seems there is some preparation needed as layers of submerged feelings are beginning to release in waves. Last night I had a nightmare, or so I’m told. I don’t remember it. Evidently I’m already tapping into the well of hidden material that is rising to the surface “in preparation.” I knew it would come, just not this soon. I am not one to apply “positive think”, but this article gave me a clue as to how I might approach this new experience with its inherent uprising of feelings.

The article itself is an excerpt from a book called: Beyond the Separate Self – The End of Anxiety and Mental Suffering by Colin Drake.

Here’s the excerpt:

“What is required is a paradigm shift which will change [how one sees] the moment to moment experience… The easiest way to do this is to enquire into the nature of life, which entails investigating experience itself:

1. [Become aware that] ‘Life is just a series of moment-to-moment experiences.’

2. Any moment of experience has only three elements: thoughts, sensations, and awareness of these thoughts and sensations.

3.Thoughts and sensations are ephemeral, that is they come and go, are ‘things’ that are perceived.

4.Awareness is the constant subject, the ‘perceiver’ of thoughts and sensations and that which is always present.

5. All thoughts and sensations appear in awareness, exist in awareness, and subside back into awareness. Before any particular thought or sensation there is effortless awareness of ‘what is’: the sum of all thoughts and sensations occurring at any given instant. During the thought or sensation in question, there is effortless awareness of it within ‘what is’. Then when it has gone there is still effortless awareness of ‘what is.’

6. So the body/mind is experienced as a flow of ephemeral objects appearing in this awareness. Any external object or thing is experienced as a combination of thought and sensation. It is awareness of these thoughts and sensations that constitutes our experience.

7. Therefore, this awareness is the constant substratum in which all things appear to arise, exist and subside. All living things rely on awareness of their environment to exist and their behaviour is directly affected by this. Thus this awareness exists at a deeper level than body/mind (and matter/energy) and we are this awareness!

8. This does not mean that at a surface level we are not the mind and body, for they arise in, are perceived by and subside back into awareness, which is the deepest and most fundamental level of our being. If we choose to identify with this deepest level – awareness – rather than the surface level - mind/body - then thoughts and sensations are seen for what they truly are – just ephemeral objects which come and go, leaving awareness itself totally unaffected..."

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I am also reminded by this that my “preparation” is really about getting back to the basics: awareness, openness, allowing and trusting. Bringing awareness to my experience, with its inherent feelings – and – bringing awareness to the inherent Awareness in which this life-experience is occurring; being open to seeing Life unfolding ItSelf in all of this experience through the viewfinder of Awareness – allowing it all; trusting this innate sense of Beingness that lives here – that lives this Life that is living ItSelf here; and REMEMBERing that That is who “I” am within this whirlwind of thought, feeling, and emotion…

At this point life is a blur, as I am beginning to experience this experience as a “death” of sorts; a death of a way of life, its conditionings and attachments – with the necessary losses, sadness and grief that accompanies that; as well as the anxiety and uncertainty for a life-experience yet to be lived. Yet I know that this “death” that is about to occur is absolutely necessary for the Kindling of Life…

Once again stepping into the unknown…

~*~


For a wonderful piece on “story” read the post at
Grace Is Now