Nature's Call

A difficult week here. Facing reality as it is has been intense.

Late Friday afternoon, needing to find a get-away, I drove to a place where I used to walk near an old agricultural canal. The path along the canal is rather wide, winding through open space, a wildlife refuge, huge cottonwoods and pines. Many people walk, jog and ride bikes here. From the parking lot there is a foot bridge to get over the canal to the pathway. When I used to walk here I would be about halfway over the bridge when I would feel myself take in a huge breath and relax – as if relieved by entering the gateway to nature. Due to health issues in the last several years I haven’t been able to take my usual walks here, and I have missed it. So Friday when I needed a respite, and didn’t have time to drive the 40 mins to my usual retreat place, I thought to take this quick drive to a familiar place and re-discover a familiar sanctuary.

Being late afternoon – after 3:30pm – the sun was far to the west leaving long shadows as it shone through the clouds. This long-shadowed light was comforting. I’m not usually out at this time of day, but I love the late afternoon sun. As I pulled into the dirt parking lot, classical music playing on the radio, I felt the familiar deep breath, and saw a hawk swooping in the sky. The tension began to subside. I found a space to park in the small lot at the end of the row, tucked away from the comings and goings in and out of the parking lot.

As I sat there taking in the scenery with my senses, I reflected that I needed to start seeing my situation with new eyes. I have to see it as a life *experience,* a new opportunity, as uncomfortable and intense as it is, and one that I would rather not be experiencing. I realized that life is just an experience, and we’re not guaranteed what experience we’re going to get, even if it’s due in part to our choices along the way. So I have to deal with what is - now – along with the discomfort, the frustration, the anger, sadness and grief. I have to *move* with the way life is moving.

I continued reflecting. Despite inner and outer life chaos I was beginning to feel the call of Nature – like a homing call. The still, yet fluid movement of Existence, in the scenery around me, was drawing me in from the outward experience of chaos. I watched as people walked their dogs on the path, and in the distant field near a frozen pond. It was quite pastoral and picturesque – and soothing. While sitting there it occurred to me that trees are just being trees, mountains are just being mountains (yes, there are mountains there), fields are just being fields, frozen ponds are just being frozen ponds, clouds just being clouds, hawks just being hawks. Everything is just being what it is. Life is just life – being lived, being experienced: people walking dogs, crossing foot bridges and fields – life falling apart and coming together. And of course it’s *all* Existence, all Consciousness, “The Mystery” disguised as trees, mountains, fields, frozen ponds, clouds, people, dogs, hawks. LIFE disguised as life.

I wrote in my journal that I know I need to open up to this particular experience of life, to the perfect brilliant experience of Life in all its expressions, all its experiences – including my present experience. This truth seems so obvious, and yet I find I need to keep seeing it – to be reminded of it again and again… And life is certainly providing those reminders in one form or another!

I just happened to look up from writing in my journal just as a flock of geese had taken off from out in the field. They were climbing into the sky, merging into the usual V formation, except for one. She went off in a totally different direction, all by herself – unfettered – following her own internal rhythm, her own nature – right over me. I couldn’t help but notice the metaphor and smiled. The Lone Goose – following her own path in flight…

I plan to return to my “new” sanctuary often. This time in nature, seeing the innate movement of nature, inspired me to want to experience life in a new way – more flexibly, more simply, as I also noticed this week that I seem to create a lot of complexity, and need to “decomplexify” – kind of like detoxifying I think. Life, it seems, is offering me/us this opportunity. I intend to go willingly, and see where this life experience goes… Who knows where I’ll/we’ll land…

Honk :)