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sometimes inspiring, sometimes personal meanderings of the Heart's opening in the every-day-ness of Life...

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Omen of Change...

This ominous looking winged creature showed up at the back door on July 11th. Its wing span was at least 4 inches tip to tip – probably more. Its head still encased in its chrysalis. I had no idea what it was, so I contacted Cate Kerr from Beyond The Fields We Know. She is an aficionado of Flora, Fauna and Bugs, :) as well as a great photographer! She kindly went on a “diagnostic expedition” and returned a couple of days later with her findings. It was, she said, a Big Poplar Sphinx Moth. Looked like a stealth bomber to me! Being a mystic, I went on my own expedition to see what its symbolism might be. Mystics are like that. :) We like to explore and directly experience all aspects of Truth and the wisdom that shows up at the door.

As it turns out there are multiple meanings, but in general “moths” are ancient symbols of change – new directions – and revealing that which has been hidden. Good Omen I thought… And Sphinx – well there are multiple cultural meanings as well – but a Sphinx is kind of like a Chimera, a creation of the imagination - symbolizing a merging, or union, of many aspects - mind and body, intellect and spirit, Divine and human. Whatever cultural myths are believed become embodied in its symbols and spirituality – like separation.

On the same day that the Sphinx Moth landed, I had written in my journal: “There is definitely the *feel* of a shift in my life – a change of direction – but I have no idea what that is to be.” For a couple of months I’ve been experiencing this shift, getting these little hits, these feelings that life was being turned in another direction; that I have reached some kind of “turning point”, or what the Buddhists call a “turning of the wheel”, but was experienced as being stopped dead in my tracks, unable to move, to turn, to navigate – like being ground to a halt. My navigational system – my compass – is changing.
Direction: Unknown.

There was also a sense that all the scaffoldings that had held “me” in place needed to collapse – particularly the “spiritual scaffoldings” of “non-duality.” Meaning the framework, the conceptual structure of “non-duality” – not the actual *experience* of Beingness as It is. And with this there was a sense that there would be “new directions”, “new meanderings” along life’s path – unfettered, unencumbered, unbounded – out of the box. In a sense a move toward a freer, more authentic way of being in the world.

I am currently experiencing a great deal of unrest, unsettledness, and yes, even a sense of separation with all this – as if shaken to the core – which emerged this last week as another bout with “illness” that flattened me for several days. More scaffoldings collapsing…

What I seem to understand at this point in the shift - what I have always known, but have felt constrained by these mental “frameworks” - is that Life/Awareness/The Beloved/Existence *delights* in expressing ItSelf, and *how* It expresses ItSelf really doesn’t matter to It. Awareness has no concept of non-dual awareness, of non-dual language, of non-duality. It *sees* everything as ItSelf, and therefore as not separate from ItSelf. The idea that it is “non-dual” or “dual” does not even occur to It. It does not concern ItSelf with “non-duality” – or duality for that matter. It doesn’t *see* duality, the self, the me, as a problem to overcome, or be seen through, or merged with, as other than non-dual. The whole me/no-me, self/no-self concept, often discussed in non-dual circles, doesn’t matter anymore. I somehow had constrained mySelf by subtly making those very linear delineations, splitting Existence in two – creating duality; becoming more *self* conscious - trying to fit this expression of Being into a “non-dual” conceptual framework, instead of just Being what I already knew myself to be. My SELF!
BEingness being ItSelf…

What a relief! Such freedom! I can just be ME! - living from the Heart and not the framework, the scaffolding. In a sense I muted this Aliveness that wants to express here *through* constraining myself to the frameworks and scaffoldings of *conceptual* “non-dual” ideas, interpretations, language and beliefs – trying to fit myself into a nice neat “spiritual” box. And evidently this “new direction” is about coming Alive again, rekindling the Life that already lives here -“outside the box.”

Our Eternal Beingness only expresses “Livingness.” It’s only purpose, evidently, is to express Life, in all of its forms. “Livingness” expressing ItSelf as Life – all life, not just “non-dual” life – whatever that might mean…

Cue moth…



33 comments:

  1. I love this rebirth from caterpillar to moth. I love the moth coming to the door, the entry point. so much rich symbolism here. And I love this distinction between the scientist and the mystic, how differently they see the world. And of course you are a mystic, watching for signs of change, being open to them, setting the intention for them. And then becoming simply you! sensing the liberating and transformative that is waiting to rise and take flight.

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  2. Hi, Christine...oh, my friend, we grant ourselves just enough scaffolding to hang ourselves with! Thank goodness. :)

    Every time I see a big moth (never THAT big!), I think of the one that showed up in Carlos Castaneda's book "Tales of Power"...helper, herald, bringer of knowledge. That's what you are!

    Love and hugs,
    M.

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  3. ZDS ~ Thank you :) Yes, being open and simply being... Ready for flight... :)

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  4. Hello Maria! So good to see you here again my friend! Love Carlos' symbolism of the moth as well. Seems we are all "bringers of knowledge" - passing that flashlight around again, helping each other to see... Have been enjoying the view through your window of wisdom lately...

    Heart Hugs, C

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  5. Beautiful. "Awareness has no concept of non-dual awareness..." isn't it amazing how we can cling to a concept or belief even when the essence of that concept is to free us from such? Blessings on your journey and embracing your shift which commingles with all of us in Unity and "livingness"...

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  6. WOW!!...Dearest Christine...not much gets more exciting than change. And change coupled with an open heart is nothing shy of pure Heaven...at Light speed. Thank you...and all the 'rest' on this sweet thread...for Being such a pristine Mirror. For Being the actual weave of the safety net...the actual Arms of Love.
    xoxo

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  7. Hello Darla! Thank you... Yes, so true, and then waking up to that - all bringing the light of wisdom to help each other see more clearly... Even Sphinx Moths :)

    I see you have made your move to Arizona! It sounds like you are settling in well... Blessings to you as well... Christine

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  8. Dear Leslie ~ I am learning from you Dear Heart - so open to Life, so unconditionally Loving, so Free! :) You are a wonderful Mirror!

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  9. What an incredible symbol of change and transformation - a true gift that landed right on your doorstep!

    I looked up the symbolism of the moth in the book Animal Speak and thought I'd share here. First and foremost, moths represent transformation - as you've indicated. But they also represent joy. They are thought to present themselves for you to look at the presence or absence of joy in your life - and then to embrace change when the opportunity present itself.

    Amazing insights you've shared here about stepping "outside of the box" with change, and letting go of the frameworks that we are trained to live by. That is the hardest part of all. Best wishes to you brave soul!

    Kristen.

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  10. Very poignant and beautiful expression of what you are going through right now, Christine. Your insights on change an d"recovery" from fixations of self-identity modes of living, and the full circle to BE-ing are profound. Collapse and letting go can be very scary. I admire your courage during this time of great change, and will remember your insights shared here. And I love how the moth arrived just as you were in the midst of this change. I found animal symbolism fascinating. Lately I've been feeling sparrows, or an affinity with sparrows. Given some tough days happening here recently, I looked up what the sparrow signifies--vigilance in goals, creativity, and keeping the burdens of the heart light. So maybe not surprising I've been encountering the birds at many turns. :o) Wishing continued better physical health, and not least joy for the new journey you're on! ((HUGS))

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  11. Kristen ~ Thank you for looking up the symbolism... I have Animal Speak too :) I must have missed that part about joy. So thank you for reminding me about watching for and being aware of the presence of joy... C

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  12. Thank you Tracy ` Yes, definitely a scary time... Just staying open to what is. I like the symbolism for sparrows - "keeping the burdens of the heart light." Most definitely! And giving our hearts a place to rest in the middle of all the changes. Peace,C

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  13. Hello Christine,
    Had my own experience with the Sphinx Moth yesterday except there were two back to back on a Maple leaf.....Found your explanation and said that's It!!! Nature is so profound...Interesting aside...took picture with cell phone, colours were a blue-green hue!
    Thank you

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    1. Amazing aren't they! Was so surprised to see this one on the screen door. Haven't seen on sense... Thanks for coming by and leaving a comment about your find. Nature is so profound indeed!

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    2. I have been searching to not only identify these,moths but to find the meaning of having them basically stalk me for the past 6 weeks, oh what a gift! Change was absolutely necessary in my like, I had been struggling to get independent & stand on my own 2 feet for a while and was in an abusive relationship for the past year. These 'Mournful Sphinx' moths had been straight up dive bombing me for a few weeks, while I was still with the boyfriend, then as I finally seperayed myself from him (having to get a no trespassing warrant) the moths stopped dive bombing me and began to fly up to my face & head & flutter around me very close as if they were giving me 'butterfly kisses' & a few coming I, at night to rest in my home! I haven't seen them for a few days now, I believe that the universe was telling me that it was time for change & then the 'kisses' for approval of change, this is crazy but so on target!

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  14. I'm so glad I've come across your post. I had a similar encounter with a Big Poplar Sphinx Moth last night when it came to my front door. I gently picked it up (so my dogs wouldn't hurt it) and brought it in to photograph. It crawled up my arm and around my neck and ear. I set it free in a tree away from my dogs. I have been discouraged from constant pain and fatique for a long time and I too, feel a shift and sense that this moth was more of a messenger than "just" an insect that happened to show up. It was a very special encounter.

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    1. Thanks for coming by Mary! How interesting that you experienced the Sphinx Moth. They are quite large and ominous looking aren't they? I have only seen this one. Am glad it was a good omen for you :)

      I thank you for your comment because it gave me a chance to read this post again - reading things I needed to hear again! And interestingly it is a year to the day that the Sphinx Moth showed up at my door! And as you can see from my current post that I am apparently in the midst of another shift and new directions! :)

      Let's hope this "omen" will bring some health changes that are positive for you.

      Be Well... Christine

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  15. The type of moth I had an encounter with a couple of nights ago was the Male Black Witch Moth. It only shows up at nite, it was sitting there, on a shelf in the pantry. Must have been around 6 inches wide (or a little more). Can anyone tell me if its symbolism is the same as the rest of the moths or do each one of them have a particular meaning?
    Sorry to sing as "anonymous" - my name is Sonia

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    1. Hello Sonia... Am not sure whether each moth has their own meaning or not. You might try to Google "symbolism for Witch Moth" and see what comes up, since you already know the name of the type of moth it was... From my own search it seems that in general moths are ancient symbols of change... But there are other levels of meaning as well.

      Good luck in your search!

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  16. Hi I'm new to this page. I found 5 moths in my home today. One after the other. For some reason I'm terrified of them. My partner picked them up in a jar and set them free. So strange as we never get moths at our place and I was the one who discovered them all even though my partner had just come out of the same room. There is obviously a message for me. These were just regular 2cm dark brown moths.

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    1. Moths are just moths :) We are the ones that put a meaning on them, or interpret them to have symbolism. Look to see what else is happening in your life and that will give you the "message." :) Thanks for visiting...

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  17. I just looked up symbolic meaning of moth since I have seen them inside my apartment lately. I resonate with your description of the energy they bring, thank you for sharing your journey, reading this made me feel a sense of peace in a uncertain time.

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    1. Glad this was helpful and gave you a sense of peace. Thank you for visiting...

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  18. How enlightening it is to read all of your sharing here! I had just finished praying intensely to God about my grief over my Dad's passing 2 years ago this Dec. 9th and my concerns regarding a personal relationship. I was exiting my apartment building and noticed three moths on the glass door. My parents and I have always been very close, and I am an only child. A few months ago I found a lifeless dragonfly in the back of my parents' car resting by the back window. It is still there. I looked up its meanin which apparently also includes change. Perhaps some of you have insights on my encounters with these blessed creatures. Thank you much.

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    1. Thank you for sharing your experiences. There are many resources on line that may be able to give you "insights" on the meaning of these creatures.

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  19. I love how things show up in just the right time.
    I found a type of Sphinx Moth caterpillar directly beneath the driver's door of my car after visiting a colleague yesterday. I didn't know what kind of caterpillar it was, but the single "eye" located just behind it's head certainly caught my attention.
    I sourced my friends and my inner mystic as well... and Google. All Hail the Google! It led me to you and more deep symbolism. Thank you for sharing your journey. It is supporting me on mine.

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    1. Thanks for stopping by and leaving your comment...

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  20. I felt a lot of a freedom and relief going through me after reading this exquisite observation of yours:

    "What I seem to understand at this point in the shift - what I have always known, but have felt constrained by these mental “frameworks” - is that Life/Awareness/The Beloved/Existence *delights* in expressing ItSelf, and *how* It expresses ItSelf really doesn’t matter to It."

    I thank you.

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    1. Glad it spoke to you... Hard to believe it's been 6 years since I wrote this! Good reminder for me to read it again...

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