Rest in the Great Heart...

Rest in the Great Heart – and wait…
Entrust yourself to
the Heart of the Great Mystery ~
The Ineffable Mystery
That which infuses all life
with the greatest Mystery~
Existence…

Let yourself be held by the
rhythm of the Cosmos
Let it
take you ~ carry you
in its music

Be absorbed in its rhythmic
fluidity of Silent Awareness
beyond time and space…

And be still

Embrace your Fear
and allow ~
The “answers” will be revealed
in their own time
by the movement of
the Universe -
the movement of Life ItSelf ~ within you…

Rest in the Great Heart of the Mystery…

Trust…

All is held in place by
the Great, ever-lasting
Mystery of Existence
like the stars suspended in space…

Let go
 into The Mystery
the Unknown…

Be absorbed in it – by it
Dissolve in it…

Experience
the “energetic rhythm”
of the Great Heart
that never
ceases
to
BE

Mystic Meandering
Meditative Writings
Dec. 10, 2015

Simply Sad-ing...

There is a sense that “the path” is changing once again – opening up – carrying me like a river to “places” unknown. And I don’t mean physical places, but those internal places of Spirit/Soul/Being ~ Heart. I’ve had these feelings before. Maybe it’s just that melancholy feeling I get when Fall comes round again – although it is my favorite season. Or maybe it’s a culmination of things coming together – and “falling” apart – the normal cycles of time, season, life - allowing the things that need to die in me to die.

Whatever it is, there is a deep sadness that sings in my heart these days – reasons not necessary. It emerges, subsides and re-emerges – like the seasons. So I listen to its song. She is really the Heart’s whispers disguised in the language of “sadness.” She has been waiting for me to open this window and listen – without agenda - not needing to *define* it in any particular way – only listening and letting her sing her song in my heart - calling me "Home." She is simply another pathway *in* to the Heart of Being.

There is a rawness and vulnerability in being open to sadness that feels like I’m letting go of everything that is familiar, and heading out into the open sea. And maybe that is the gift of sadness – allowing myself to be open to life, penetrable by life, experiencing the rawness of life with its feelings – not trying to be strong, to find cause, to fix it, or cover it over… Instead, I let sadness take me where *it* needs to go on its way to the Heart - as a natural part of life’s unfolding…

This does not mean that I am always sad, or wallowing in sadness here. I’m just experiencing how she dances in and out of being. It’s simply sadness – a feeling. Or one could say – simply “sading” - a verb, not an identity. Feelings are just different colors, different shades of Life living Itself, dancing to different tunes.

What color are you dancing to today?

Art: Gray Swirls
Craypas Oil Sticks

Omen of Change...

This ominous looking winged creature showed up at the back door on July 11th. Its wing span was at least 4 inches tip to tip – probably more. Its head still encased in its chrysalis. I had no idea what it was, so I contacted Cate Kerr from Beyond The Fields We Know. She is an aficionado of Flora, Fauna and Bugs, :) as well as a great photographer! She kindly went on a “diagnostic expedition” and returned a couple of days later with her findings. It was, she said, a Big Poplar Sphinx Moth. Looked like a stealth bomber to me! Being a mystic, I went on my own expedition to see what its symbolism might be. Mystics are like that. :) We like to explore and directly experience all aspects of Truth and the wisdom that shows up at the door.

As it turns out there are multiple meanings, but in general “moths” are ancient symbols of change – new directions – and revealing that which has been hidden. Good Omen I thought… And Sphinx – well there are multiple cultural meanings as well – but a Sphinx is kind of like a Chimera, a creation of the imagination - symbolizing a merging, or union, of many aspects - mind and body, intellect and spirit, Divine and human. Whatever cultural myths are believed become embodied in its symbols and spirituality – like separation.

On the same day that the Sphinx Moth landed, I had written in my journal: “There is definitely the *feel* of a shift in my life – a change of direction – but I have no idea what that is to be.” For a couple of months I’ve been experiencing this shift, getting these little hits, these feelings that life was being turned in another direction; that I have reached some kind of “turning point”, or what the Buddhists call a “turning of the wheel”, but was experienced as being stopped dead in my tracks, unable to move, to turn, to navigate – like being ground to a halt. My navigational system – my compass – is changing.

Direction: Unknown.

There was also a sense that all the scaffoldings that had held “me” in place needed to collapse – particularly the “spiritual scaffoldings” of “non-duality.” Meaning the framework, the conceptual structure of “non-duality” – not the actual *experience* of Beingness as It is. And with this there was a sense that there would be “new directions”, “new meanderings” along life’s path – unfettered, unencumbered, unbounded – out of the box. In a sense a move toward a freer, more authentic way of being in the world.

I am currently experiencing a great deal of unrest, unsettledness, and yes, even a sense of separation with all this – as if shaken to the core – which emerged this last week as another bout with “illness” that flattened me for several days. More scaffoldings collapsing…

What I seem to understand at this point in the shift - what I have always known, but have felt constrained by these mental “frameworks” - is that Life/Awareness/The Beloved/Existence *delights* in expressing ItSelf, and *how* It expresses ItSelf really doesn’t matter to It. Awareness has no concept of non-dual awareness, of non-dual language, of non-duality. It *sees* everything as ItSelf, and therefore as not separate from ItSelf. The idea that it is “non-dual” or “dual” does not even occur to It. It does not concern ItSelf with “non-duality” – or duality for that matter. It doesn’t *see* duality, the self, the me, as a problem to overcome, or be seen through, or merged with, as other than non-dual. The whole me/no-me, self/no-self concept, often discussed in non-dual circles, doesn’t matter anymore. I somehow had constrained mySelf by subtly making those very linear delineations, splitting Existence in two – creating duality; becoming more *self* conscious - trying to fit this expression of Being into a “non-dual” conceptual framework, instead of just Being what I already knew myself to be. My SELF!

BEingness being ItSelf…

What a relief! Such freedom! I can just be ME! - living from the Heart and not the framework, the scaffolding. In a sense I muted this Aliveness that wants to express here *through* constraining myself to the frameworks and scaffoldings of *conceptual* “non-dual” ideas, interpretations, language and beliefs – trying to fit myself into a nice neat “spiritual” box. And evidently this “new direction” is about coming Alive again, rekindling the Life that already lives here -“outside the box.”

Our Eternal Beingness only expresses “Livingness.” It’s only purpose, evidently, is to express Life, in all of its forms. “Livingness” expressing ItSelf as Life – all life, not just “non-dual” life – whatever that might mean…

Cue moth…

The Rain Connects Me...

The rain connects me

with the yearnings

of the Heart ~

with feelings deep inside…

The rain connects me

with the gentleness and softness

of memories…

The rain connects me

with the woundings

of missed moments,

the tears of loss,

and allows them all to come home…

The rain connects me

with peace and tranquility,

with simplicity,

and time to Just BE…

The rain connects me

with the Heart again.

It cracks me open and

floods me with the embrace of Love…

The rain connects me

with the Heart of Living…

Mystic Meandering
copyright

April 22, 2010

Photo – my April calendar page :)

~*~

This morning was what my husband and I call “an Alaska day” – rainy and low cloud cover over the mountains. We had the good fortune to take a trip to Alaska nearly 23 years ago! My how time flies… We *loved* the rainy weather there. So we got out our “Alaska” photo album today and reminisced. Looking at the photos seemed like it must have been a past life. It seemed faint, distant, not real. I see myself there and yet I know that I’m not there-there – of course, it’s a memory. And I’m not the same as then. Things change in 23 years, and not just physically. Back then there was no real “spiritual path,” no sense of real Awareness, no mindfulness about life, no sense of just Being, not the savoring of each moment.

We thought we’d go back to Alaska for more visits, for more moments, but Life had other directions to go… Reminiscing this morning reminded me that there’s really only this moment that we’re living. There really is no past, or future – except in the mind. No matter what moment I am in, it’s the present moment. The trip to Alaska was a present moment – back then – and now only exists in memory and photos, as if it never really happened. The rain this morning was a present moment that turned into another present moment and another – which actually turned into a blizzard of snow - and then back to rain in the next moment. And tomorrow will be another series of present moments, all connected.

Today reminded me that life, like the weather, is “momentary” - a series of present moments – one right after the other. And each moment has something to offer, an awareness: a pink lady with a white dog in a moment of connection; a reflection in a puddle; the memory of missed moments, of losses; mud-wrestling with suffering giving way to clarity, or the simple joy of connecting with the rain… All fluidly connected – moment-by-moment - delighting in each little moment– one-by-one. The Heart of Living…

~*~