I’m still
pruning and clearing the deadwood here. :)
And I thought I’d share my observations.
As with
stepping back and looking at the tree to see where it needs pruning, it seems I
have to keep stepping back to look at myself with the Light of Awareness, to
see what needs pruning - or else life will show me through situations and
events :) like it just did in the previous 2 posts – here and here - showing me
the dead wood of ignorance, and the branches of self-delusion that I have
become entangled in recently. Pruning
sometimes requires surgical precision. And
sometimes the dead wood practically falls off by itself once the clear seeing
of Awareness occurs.
Clearing
the dead wood, as I’m discovering, is also a process of stepping back to discover
the Life that is already Here; that which is living this life called “me”, seeing
beyond the dead wood to what thrives within, and what is experiencing this life
being lived in every moment – Consciousness ItSelf… But for some reason I keep clinging to the
dead wood, erroneously believing what the mind tells me, with its emotionally
habituated responses, in some kind of perpetual relationship…
This pruning
and clearing away of the dead wood is an internal process of clearly seeing the
beliefs, the mental concepts, emotional reactivity, the conceptual frameworks
and structures that I have lived by, even “the spiritual paths” I’ve traveled
down, that no longer reflect the Truth, that don’t allow Aliveness to thrive, that
no longer allow flow with the movement of Life.
They must be seen through to the spaciousness of Truth ItSelf…
I
recently heard a definition of ignorance as the inability to see clearly the
Truth of who we really are – our True Nature, our Beingness – the simple Silent
Awareness that is not reactive to any life situation but sees and allows
*every* situation (and also allows for action when needed). But somehow I keep forgetting to see life
with this Light of Awareness and I get all hung up on the deadwood, living from
the place of ignorance, identified *with* the story of the “bad” neighbor, or
irritating husband, the failing economy, the unfairness of life, the
dysfunctional needy family, or my emotionally fractured self, etc. – all
stories that reinforce the inability to see clearly, leaving me veiled to the
Truth of my Being.
It’s an
ongoing cyclical process, this pruning and clearing. It always seems to come around as life
spirals onward to new awarenesses, new openings of Truth – revealing ItSelf. It’s a natural process actually. Who I believe myself to be is pruned away in
order for the Truth to be revealed.
There’s no getting comfortable on the “spiritual path.” It seems “the path” is about staying open and
aware, pruning what is no longer needed, what no longer allows the Truth to be
seen, and allowing the bare bones Truth that is already there to be intimately
known; not arriving at or attaining any special state of “enlightenment” as a
one time event that we can claim for ourselves as yet another identity – but
being continually opened by Life, to the Heart of Being, and allowing the Truth
that is there to unfold in and through us.
In doing so we are pruned – until we see beyond the deadwood of ignorance
and self-delusion.
If I ask
– Who/What am I really? What is really
here? Or, what is the Truth in this
situation? – in a meditative way - not looking for answers in the mind, but in
the Heart of Being - I see that paradoxically I am both the story *and* Aware Consciousness
in which this story of “me” plays out.
Not either/or, but one and the same.
In some ways “the stories” we find ourselves in become “the teaching” if
we’re paying attention and not being absorbed and defined by our stories – as I
was just recently. Often what we dismiss
as story shows us where we most need pruning, where we need to see clearly, in
order to thrive in the Truth. And sometimes
the best teaching comes out of our own failings to see clearly – once we see…
And it is
then seen that thriving in the Truth of who we are is really a matter of
recognizing the living Truth that we are, the Spaciousness in which the story
of our life occurs – like the clouds that are suspended in the spaciousness of
the sky. In spending time in meditative Silence, in the Spaciousness of Pure
Awareness, I recognize that the Truth is so much vaster and clearer than the
stories I’ve been telling myself *about* “the situation.” The Truth of Pure Beingness that we are
always sees clearly… It’s where we
thrive…
deep and eloquent. i know i have a lot of pruning to do myself. i was thinking just this morning that i am seeing in habitual ways. and thus missing the truth of my matter. thanks for your thoughts. something i could reread a number of times.
ReplyDeleteThank you Dear Suki... I'm heading for the cushion this morning to just give myself to the Silence of Being, and thrive :)
DeleteThis is incredibly profound, Christine! I especially like how your express this, "...discover the Life that is already here" and of continuing to be open and aware. We are creatures of habit, and often can get stuck in our ways of doing and being. Taking time to keep those channels open is such a big part of the path and practice. And I also resonated with what you said about, the best lesson come from failing to see clearly. We need to take the blinders off more often, don't we? ;o) It is a blessing to be hear to prune and clear with you, my friend. Happy Weekend ((HUGS))
ReplyDeleteThank you Tracy - am glad it spoke to you. It felt like a lot of rambling when I wrote it, but I am glad it was beneficial... Just getting clear with it all myself - learning to thrive :) Hugs too - C
DeleteYes. Truth spoken here. Thank you.
ReplyDelete