Have you
ever been in a place emotionally and didn’t realize till *after* you left that
place that you had even been there?
Well, that’s where I’ve been.
It wasn’t
till Friday evening that I experienced a “shift” that I realized I had been
experiencing a kind of underground depression – which is not new to me. She visits often, but this time was more
subtle. Hidden, it becomes what feels
like a natural way of seeing reality. I don’t know why the shift happened, as I
wasn’t trying to *do* anything about where I was because I didn’t realize I was
there. She had numbed me. Oh I felt a certain sadness and tiredness of
life, a melancholy, a dullness, but really didn’t think of it as “depression” –
until the shift, when my view of reality changed dramatically.
Today was
one of those brown, overcast winter days – kinda like I’ve been feeling for
weeks until yesterday. J DH and I went out for a walk, and I snapped a
couple of photos along the way. I
thought it would be fun to post the shots as they actually were – with a
quote/poem underneath - and then the photo that I “shifted” with the Invert
function on Adobe Fireworks, giving an almost magical view of “reality ” – to
me anyway - like a magical forest… J Representing a change of perspective…
“Life is a huge, urgent
invitation.
It is so easy to lose your way -
to end up respectable,
trusted and admirably
fulfilling your role.
to end up respectable,
trusted and admirably
fulfilling your role.
Yet the whole time you could be
suffocating inside
and no one sees it.
and no one sees it.
Stagnation is the status quo.
All things seem blurred in this half-sleep.
All things seem blurred in this half-sleep.
The air is poor in limbo:
grey is the one color there.
Boredom and indifference conspire to keep
the anxiety buried.
Perhaps it is time to leave limbo.
To awaken;
to really come alive…”
Boredom and indifference conspire to keep
the anxiety buried.
Perhaps it is time to leave limbo.
To awaken;
to really come alive…”
John O’Donohue
Christian Theologian
***
“Despite illness of body or mind,
in spite of blinding despair
or habitual belief,
who you are is whole.
Let nothing separate you from the Truth.
The soul, illumined from within,
longs to be known…
Undying, untouched by fire,
or the storms of life,
there is a place inside
where stillness and abiding peace reside.
You can ride the breath to go there.
Despite doubt or hopeless turns of mind,
you are not broken.
Spirit surrounds,
embraces,
fills you from the inside out.
or habitual belief,
who you are is whole.
Let nothing separate you from the Truth.
The soul, illumined from within,
longs to be known…
Undying, untouched by fire,
or the storms of life,
there is a place inside
where stillness and abiding peace reside.
You can ride the breath to go there.
Despite doubt or hopeless turns of mind,
you are not broken.
Spirit surrounds,
embraces,
fills you from the inside out.
Release everything
that isn’t your true nature.
What’s left?
the fullness of light…”
Danna Faulds
Yoga Practitioner
Yoga Practitioner
There you are you have written my 'awakening' post for me! And so eloquently! I'm going to link to you if that is okay when I write? You inspire me, and those images, they are beautiful. x
ReplyDeleteOh dear, Sue, didn't mean to step on your toes! Just sharing my recent experience and the sudden unexpected shift. As far as I know this will be the only post on that subject - hopefully :) I have different posts in mind for the rest of this week. :) I am so looking forward to your series on Yoga and Meditation related to your own experience that starts next Sunday... Sure you can link to the post!
DeleteDepression can be very subtle, indeed... I've been there too. She has a way of drifting in, almost like fog. She lingers sometimes, unbeknownst...She's a slippery "devil" ;o) I've experienced this before--depression,she arrives, only to sneak away again. It's quite remarkable to realize one is down only after the fact. But that we recognize honors the situation, and maybe that we have come through it slightly more unscathed than last time. :o) LOVE these magical images, Christine. Happy Day ((HUGS))
ReplyDeleteThanks Tracy... Yes, it is so subtle at times, and at other times I feel as if I have fallen into a dark hole! As you say, she comes and and goes unannounced - like fog, like a mist sometimes too where you don't even realize what has happened... Yes, recognition is key... Happy Week :)
DeleteThese photos are wild. I love them and they so well express what your words describe. Love the John O'D. Hope your shift out of depression lasts for you. I agree w/Tracy that the important part is the awakening and seeing where you are and have been.
ReplyDeleteThank you Suki! :) Well, she came back to visit again today. Oh well - the ebb and flow of life, which only tells me that she has more to show me. It's like Tracy said, it's like a fog that comes and goes. Gives me a chance to sit with her and allow her to speak, to show me the deeper need. Yes, awakening and recognition - definitely. Heart Hugs...
DeleteI've come through years later only to discover where I had been. I don't always agree with the process but learning to recognize it surely helps. Coming through also gives us another perspective. Know that you are not alone. Love John O'Donohue and your photos! Andrea
ReplyDeleteThank you Andrea :) As the saying goes: "the only way out is through." And sometimes "awakening" is an arduous process of becoming aware, not only of what ails us, but of the wholeness that we are underneath it all...
DeleteLove that John O' Donohue quote and the way you've expressed your shift through the photos/effects, positive/negative. The river is especially intriguing.
ReplyDeleteThanks Uma :) Yeah the photos kind of remind me that things are not always what they seem, that it's really a matter of perspective. If I could only remember that! And that river *is* intriguing, except that it looks like an oil slick :( But maybe that's a matter of perspective too - lol...
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