Inner Wave "Window"

Wednesday I did the “Inner Wave” video by Gabriel Roth as my “exercise.” It was a video I had stashed away in my cabinet, in the same stack with Richard Simmons… The back cover says – “Surrender to the Dance” – “With ‘The Inner Wave’ you will investigate stillness, the mother of all rhythm, through a meditative dance journey with this pioneer of ecstatic dance… As you surrender to the dance, exploring and improvising with every part of your body, you will experience how ecstatic dance can clear your mind and open your heart, and allow you to touch the stillpoint within.” Oooo, my kind of exercise!

I cleared the den of clutter and coffee table, put the video on and stood waiting – poised. As soon as the video started playing I *knew* intuitively that this was what I was meant to be doing. You intuitively know when something feels “right” for you. Emotions stirred from within.

As soon as I started moving with the music there was a huge emotional release, as if years of stuffed feelings and stifled life let go. Feelings of grief and sadness broke free from the body, mind and heart, along with feelings of longing for the Divine. I know, here’s that separation thing again – but this was my experience. The movement immediately got me in touch with the *flow* of emotions that were just waiting under the surface. As I moved, I emoted. As I expressed I felt my heart open and let go of its contents in torrents and waves of emotion – washing through me from deep within – releasing pain, grief and sadness. It was quite intense, and very freeing… No drama, just pure expression…

It was a natural dance, rising up from within: a natural, spontaneous movement of life and a natural expression of the feelings that had been trapped in the body and heart - being stuffed with food… They were now moving through - dancing them out, letting them move me, and moving with them.

Maria, from Liminal Light, left a comment a few posts back that said in part: “Feel the movement of the emotion. Pay attention to the movement of emotion.” The dance physically allowed for awareness of this inner movement of the emotion… Ecstatic dance gave spontaneous expression to what’s inside, which ultimately turns out to be the Aliveness within – the alive, aware, awake Stillness that moves all life. Through this creative and artistic form the Formless is met and feelings are danced out in natural rhythms that rise and fall from the space of Origin; danced out from the space beyond ideas, concepts, feelings and compulsions – the field of Awareness.

The music that played in the background was a gentle pulse of drums called “Bardo” by Gabriel Roth and the Mirrors. How appropriate – taking me to the in-between space, the place of alchemy, dissolving the “self” and just purely Being… One with the movement. One with the moment. Sweet Ecstasy…

There is nothing that could be more symbolically suited for me at this time than this dance exercise. It felt deeply spiritual, like a Divine Dance with The Essence of all Dance, as well as the shadows of the “self” – in an alchemy of movement. It was like returning to an inner Flow – the Tao – the Inner Wave - as the sense of self dissolved in the Dance, and each movement became the expression of the deeper Rhythm.

However, in my exuberance I over-stressed this aging body with its chronic kidney and health issues. I haven’t felt well for the past few days. It has affected me internally. I’m sure I opened a few meridian points and channels, releasing blocked energy. So there’s probably a little cleansing going on as toxins leave my system, both physically and emotionally. Consequently my “exercise” regimen is on hold for the time being until this body re-harmonizes itself. Honestly I’m a little bummed because I love this form of “exercise!” - dance as "spiritual practice." But I continue to watch the video as there is something that moves me within even watching it….

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You can view a small portion of “The Inner Wave” with Gabriel Roth on YouTube. The first couple of minutes, as she is speaking, is especially moving :)

Gabriel Roth’s website is: http://www.gabrielleroth.com/

May we all dance in beauty…
May we all dance in peace…
May we all dance as One…

In Stillness let your dance be...

Gabriel Roth

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Fun-Qi Art™ - Christine

Exercise Humor "Window"

Okay my “spiritual friends”, it’s time to pull my head in from the window and do a little exercise… After gaining 20 pounds or more in the last 6 months and turning 61 next month, I decided it was time to get serious about shedding this tonnage rather than go into the next size pants, which would only allow me to expand more. Any of you who have weight issues will appreciate this.

This year with all my family crises, financial failings, and personal relationship shipwrecked, I have not quite lost my sanity, but I have lost a sense of will power, discipline and direction. I have lost “the fire” that once ignited a life here. And yes, I have been indulging in emotional eating… For some reason “spiritual practice” has not been enough to keep the internal fire burning, or keep the hungry ghosts at bay. Yes - I know, medieval gluttony has reincarnated itself here.

You may remember Richard Simmons, the humorous, gay exercise nut? Well it just so happened that I had two of his VHS tapes hidden away in a box from a previous life. I pulled them out several days ago and left them on the counter to remind me that it was time to do something about this self-indulgent food fetish – from a physical perspective. Exercise is a good beginning. I also know I need to look through the inner window…

This morning I woke up and said – today is the day. Richard here I come dahling… I love Richard. He has helped a lot of people who have become muddled in the pig pen – like me. I chose the video entitled: “Richard Simmons and the Silver Foxes.” It was made in 1986. It says it is for people in the years after 50. Most of the people in the video appear to be in their 70’s – which means they are probably dead by now, exercise or not. So of course I thought – piece of cake! No sweat! Nice way to get started – with, as the video says, “a warm-up session, a low-impact non-stress aerobic workout and a 3-minute relaxation exercise.”

We were to take our *resting* pulse first. Mine was already up to 90 – oops. And then it began. Within 10 minutes I was sweating. What happened to piece of cake, no sweat aerobics for the over 50 crowd! I think I’d rather have the piece of cake at this point, but I realize that would defeat the purpose and I keep going… Richard has us take our pulse again half way through: 128. Well I’ve certainly reached the aerobic level! And we keep going. I can feel the heart pounding. I keep sweating. And we’re hardly doing anything! I mean these 70 year olds on the tape are smiling and bouncing to the music like it was nothing. I’m thinking, how many more minutes does this last! At least I’m not gasping for air - yet!

My brother’s nickname for me as a youngster was “Crisco – the all purpose fat in the can.” You may remember that commercial as well. Well I hear that in my head and I know I must keep going. I’m sure from behind I am beginning to look a little “Crisco-ish” – so I push on, trying to melt the fat. I think we are about 15 minutes in and I’m ready to lay down. Another 10 mins and it’s finally over! My ending pulse is supposed to be the same as my “resting” pulse, but it is 100+ – another oops. Boy we are really out of shape here. And then he went on! This next phase evidently was the relaxation exercise with chair. My body said – Nope, sorry. I’m just going to *sit* in the chair and cool down. And maybe next time I’ll start with the “cool down” chair exercise first!

And what does all this have to do with spirituality and enlightenment – or window sitting? I have no idea, but if you see the connection, please let me know what it is! I am much more suited for the contemplative life. But I don’t want to be 300 pounds by the time I’m 80 – if I live that long. And doing this kind of workout may actually prevent that – living till 80 that is! Munchies anyone?

I’m going to try Gabriel Roth’s “The Wave” next time…. Dance as “spiritual exercise” – bringing awareness to the *movement* of Life within. That ought to melt away the fat cells in a way that suites my “mystic” nature…

See Grabriel Roth’s “The Wave” on You Tube.

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