A Mystic's "Spirituality" - a meandering...

Being an unapologetic "mystic" at Heart, since childhood,
means for me experiencing the living Presence of Life that
animates all life.  Some call that God, the Divine, The Beloved,
the Ineffable, The Mystery, Pure Consciousness, Infinite Being,
Spirit, Brahman, The Tao, the Cosmos, etc.  It has many
 names and forms. It means being able to see and experience
 "The Mystery" in the everyday-ness of life; something I am still
admittedly trying to be more aware of - to be more aware of a
 felt sense of The Sacred in the Entropy of world affairs, in the
chaotic mundane personal affairs of life circumstances as they are;
 the requirements of daily living; in the must do's and have-to's that
always find their way to the top of my list, and seem to drive my
life...

As a "mystic" I long to experience the depths of Ultimate Reality -
immersing myself in the depths of Meditative Silence, listening
to the Hush of "The Mystery."  Something I have missed being
 able to do over the last 2 years due to life circumstances.
It seems I am on a dark passage now...
Some  may assume a "mystic" doesn't experience the darker
 feelings and frustrations of life - but is always in some catatonic
 state with The Beloved...  That has not been my experience.
I try to experience the darker emotions within the context of the
Greater Reality as part of the totality of life experience...

Some feel that a mystic should have special insights or powers,
or visions, or is only interested in seeking "mystical experiences."
But for me it is not in "seeking" experiences (I have very few of
them that just happen), but being aware of and open to the movement
 of "The Mystery" within me, through its many expressions, living in
 the intimacy of "The Mystery" and at times experiencing an
intimate encounter with what I know to be "The Divine", like my
Epiphany back in 2013, or through meditative writings", and 
celestial songs (poetry) where sometimes the words just fall
 out onto the page - surprising me...

Mystical "spirituality" acknowledges the universality of what 
most have come to call "God", The Divine, or Buddha Nature,
not associated with any particular faith, religion or practice,
but transcendent truth - realizing that humans, at the very core of
their being, are both Divine and human, formlessness and form,
spirit in matter, Timelessness in time...

Wayne Teasdale, a 20th century Christian Mystic, and author of
A Mystic Heart says: "Mystic spirituality draws us into the depths
or our Being, where we come face to face with ourselves, our
weaknesses, AND with the Ultimate Mystery,  Spirituality is not
external religiosity, confined to ritual and liturgy.  It is a way of life
that effects and includes every moment of existence...  It is a disposition
to a life of depth..."

He goes on - "How we make the journey is what spirituality is really
about - finding our own path.  This means finding a way to
 [awareness of] the vast unlimited [mystery] of The Divine,
 the Mystery within.
We are created for this 'spiritual journey' - the direct and
immediate experience of Ultimate Reality, which knows everything
as ItSelf.  Being infinitely aware, it knows in a unitive and universal
fashion through awareness...  The spiritual journey is essentially one of
discovering the roots of our true identity.  It is a process of returning
to the totality of Consciousness, from which we have arisen." 
(Wayne Teasdale)

Mystic Meandering
2016

~

"We cannot live in a world that is interpreted for us by others.
[We must] take back our own listening,

use our own voice,
see our own Light"

Hildegard of Bingen

12th Century Christian Mystic

_/\_

Namaste

~

Photo - Mystic Meandering

Between Two Houses - a meandering...

Sitting watching the evening news,
I looked out the living room window - to the space
between my neighbors' houses.

Looking through
the bare branches of the trees between their homes,
I saw the pinkish, orange, gold-yellow of the sunset
fading in the West.

It occurred to me, in that moment,
that no matter what is happening on the earth,
and my personal life - the Cosmos still "works"!
The sun, the moon, the stars, the planets, the galaxies
all dance the Dance of the Cosmos -
for eons -

giving us beauty, wonder, and awe - and peace.
It's us humans that don't seem to be "working" well -
on this little planet - divided...

It also reminded me that there is a greater context
in which we live - a vaster Reality - hidden -
that I want to be aware of...

Sometimes this world seems so gray
- run by lunatics -
that I miss the beauty in
The Cosmos,
and in between spaces...

I really need to
look out my window more often! :)

And expand my view of the Universe...

Mystic Meandering
January 30, 2025

~

Photo - Mystic Meandering
The photo was actually taken in April 2023

 

The Portal of Discovery...

If there is "Enlightenment" perhaps it is when we can
accept that we are ever on the portal of discovery -
recognizing that we only have a glimpse of a larger
Reality...

"The Quest" then, is never really over.
There is no finish line, just an ever expanding
awareness of and deepening into our
True Beingness within the context of
a vaster Reality we have yet to discover.

from a conversation with my husband
12-30-24

~

Photo from the internet

 

A Far Bigger Reality? - a meandering...

 

When "window sitting" in 2010 with only the bright moon lighting
the night, the non-dual concept of "me-no-me" (or self-no-self) arose...
I scratched some notes out on the windowsill in the moonlight:

"Window sitting", like meditation, takes the focus off the "me"
and puts the focus on what is Aware within me - The Silence -
at the Core of my Being - or some call it Consciousness...
This Silence (for me) unwinds the "me" - slows it down -
gives it space...

*

Pondering the non-dual concept of whether there's a "me" or no-me
is tedious, divisive, and not very helpful - a conundrum that keeps me
 focused on the "me" as if the "me" is arguing its own existence. 
The thought arose that the tree does not argue whether it is a tree
 or not...  It just bes the tree. (Yes, that is what I wrote.) :)

The so-called "me" is like a lens through which the Essence or Core
of my Beingness sees the world, sees life, how it engages with life...

*

Recently (2024), while sitting in The Silence, these words floated
through: "there is a far bigger Reality than 'spirituality', or 'religion',
or 'non-duality.  It is a Reality inclusive of our entire personal
human existence, and human experience - as "me."

*

The sense (back in 2010 window sitting) was that we have to open
the "aperture" of the "me" - to take in the larger view, to not fixate
on *things*, like thoughts, ideas, beliefs, feelings, circumstances,
people, etc.  We have to soften our gaze to see the bigger Reality....

I/me became aware in this moment, sitting at the window, that there
 is just a fluid sense of Beingness at my Core, (the only way I know
 to describe it) - that which is Aware within me, as me, call it the
Divine Consciousness - or Essential Nature - was I now "no-me?"
And other questions arose:  Is it true that there is no "me"?
"How can that be true" (as non-dualists would argue that there is
no me - and no tree...) (I no longer ask questions regarding such
unanswerable abstractions - or maybe I just don't understand the
concept).

The sense arose in me (back then) that there is a "me" function of
"Consciousness;" a practical function.  Like a thought function, or
body function, there is a "me" function... a "me" mechanism...
(Some call this the ego)

The "me" is a function of our Divine Nature/Consciousness - not
its enemy that needs to dissolve, as some teach.  It's a conditioned
function - by life's experiences - habituated to perform in certain
ways, but that also allows the Essential/Divine Nature to express
Itself through this "me" - this human - as me...

Mystic Meandering
Nov. 2024

~

Photo taken by my brother
on the coast of Gloucester, Mass

~

You don't possess Life, Life expresses itself through *you*.
Your body is a flower that Life let bloom; a phenomenon
created by Life.

Ilchi Lee

~

The "religion" of the future will be a cosmic religion.  It should
transcend a personal God and avoid dogmas and theology.

Covering both the natural and the spiritual, it should be based
on a sense arising from the experience of all things, natural/human
and spiritual, as a meaningful unity.

Albert Einstein

The Weight of Opinions - a meandering...

While I have my personal opinions
about what just happened in this country -
and the numbing and sombering effects of
its consequences,
I must not engage in my opinions -
but turn my focus
towards the Greater Reality within myself -
for I do believe there is a Greater Reality than our
personal beliefs, religions, "spirituality", nationalism;
personal politics; and the distractions of our lives
that keep us bound to *this* time-bound reality -
that I must now learn to travel through...

For some reason this moment is a "gate" that we,
as a country and a world, must pass through  - and
learn to accept and navigate what has befallen us in
this shift in reality...

Mystic Meandering
Nov. 6, 2024

~

If there is anything you should stop wearing
as you get older is the weight of other people's
[and your own] opinions...

Author Unknown

~

Photo - Mystic Meandering

 

The "Real Journey"? - a meandering...

It may be that when we no longer know what to do
we have come to our real work,
and that when we no longer know which way to go
we have come to our real journey.

Wendell Berry

I find myself facing major life changes these days, in my 70's,
living with the questions, waiting for the way to become clear.
Watching the mysterious signposts along the way.  It's not a
crossroads exactly, nor a threshold.  It's more like limbo: all
questions, few clues, no answers.  With a timing all its own.

Berry's quote is a reminder for me in this busy-ness, work-identified
realm we live in - living under pressure to "produce", to get things
done, to "fix" yourself, physically, spiritually, psychologically,
that it takes courage to not have answers, to just slow down, to
set out on an inner journey I cannot see...

In my elder years perspectives have changed, the body has less
stamina and endurance to live the way the world lives: the hurried,
cacophony of living.  And so a "new journey" has begun, both
spiritually and physically - a slower paced interior journey -
and not necessarily meditation, but just more silence and solitude
and inner listening, when I can.  Maybe this *is* the "real journey" 
that Berry speaks of.  I'll let you know :)

~

I was journaling about this "shift" I seem to be going through
when the Inner Voice whispered:

"It's all a story" -

"You're a story within the 'Greater Story' of Existence."

I somehow felt relieved to hear this - and the recognition
that I am (my life is) only a story - as if I hadn't heard this before,
in different, more "spiritualized" words :)

Life is like a novel, the main story is your entire life,
with different chapters in it - different stories,
within a larger Story - a larger Reality.

The Inner Voice went on to say: Most people think they are in
control of their lives.  They don't realize they're just living a
story.  And the story doesn't dissolve until we die.  We are all
living the stories of our lives within a bigger context.  We are
all unique stories/expressions of the "Greater Story of Existence."
Which doesn't mean that we aren't "real", but like the wave of
the Ocean, we are each a unique expression of a greater Reality.
(And I like to think of it as a Cosmic Ocean - we are waves,
vibrations of a Cosmic Ocean that we can't see.  We are infinite
beings living a story.)

It kinda took the air out of the "self-importance" balloon; nothing
special, just a story, like everyone else, a blip in the ocean of
eternity...  It was like a burden had been lifted...  I could just
relax, internally, with no more striving after "enlightenment", or
perfection, or identifying with the "I Am"...  The story of "me" dies 
with us at death, unless "the story" is written down somewhere,
in a time bound obituary: a story of my life story...

Sigh - such relief to know I'm only a story...

BTW - if this perspective changes I'll be sure to 
write about it :) LOLOL

~

Photo - Mystic Meandering