Heart of Wonder

Today we took a little trip into the mountains to get away from the house and the basement issue for a while. We felt like Jeremiah Johnson, the character in my husband’s favorite movie, where he leaves the life he knew to find a new way of living in the rugged Rocky Mountains. In essence to escape, and ends up with more adventure than he bargained for, as well as a new perspective on life. Part of the lyrics to the theme song go: “Jeremiah Johnson made his way into the mountains, bettin’ on forgettin’ all the troubles that he knew…” We decided we needed a little forgettin’ of house troubles, at least for a few hours, and so we escaped into the mountains for some fresh air. It was actually overcast and rainy today, but it was exactly the kind of day where the pungent pine odor was very strong because of the wetness. It was a welcome relief from the musty odor we’ve been inhaling in the house.

You may be wondering what all this has to do with the picture of the angel holding a little gold ball. Well before we left for our little outing, my husband presented me with this little gift. The outside of the box said: “Angel of Wonder.” I curiously opened it, with anticipation, and pulled out this little figure as my husband explained that it was symbolic of remembering to look at life with wonder. When I looked at it for a few minutes, what I saw was the “face” of curiosity, and the phrase from one of Pema Chodron’s books popped into my mind - be curious instead of afraid. Now my husband may not be a handyman around the house, but he knows how to touch my heart – with wonderment. He has such a heart of wonder himself. He sees life totally differently than I do – which has been a good thing for me. He is very curious and adventurous, where I like stability and security. So sometimes we are like oil and vinegar, but today we were like honey and warm tea on a cool Fall day – just perfect together. And that was good for us too, to see that there is still a heart connection there. The heart of wonder still beats in the relationship, allowing us to appreciate each other, despite being at odds with each other over house issues, life issues, and all the other stressful issues that have been sending us down the rapids lately. It was a wonder-full respite as we spent time in the wonder of nature, smelling the fresh air and pine. I got lost in the moment without the usual worry about life’s circumstances, enjoying my partner’s company and conversation. Escaping into the mountains brought a fresh perspective. Seeing life with a heart of wonder opened me to seeing with present moment awareness, with curiosity, instead of fear and fret. Life feels workable again. Ahhhh….

The end of the theme song for Jeremiah Johnson goes: “The story doesn’t always go the way you had in mind.” My husband gave his perspective on what has become our own theme phrase lately. He said, as we’re driving the winding mountainous roads: “That doesn’t mean that it goes “bad” – it just goes differently. And looking at life with wonder gives you the courage to renew your life from a new perspective…” Wow – now there’s some wisdom for you! I admire his innocent heart of wonder and wisdom. It gives me the courage to see life with that same sense of wonderment – with curiosity – with awareness – with heart wisdom.