Soft Heart Window

Window sitting is having a rather subtle but welcome affect on this Heart of mine. There is an opening and a softening that just wants to take life in, with more of an in-the-moment, spontaneous, moment-to-moment existence – and – wants to express its softness, its gentleness, its kindness.

This Heart softening, I’ve noticed, seems to “allow” a lot more than it used to. People and the circumstances of life are given more lee-way, unopposed, unresisted. There is less of a need for argument – well sometimes. I notice that being loving, being compassionate, is really just meeting people where they are… Just accepting and embracing people and life circumstances without agenda, without preconceived ideas of how it ought to be.

The realization that there is a loving, compassionate Nature that lives inside this Heart softens this sense of “me”, makes it more transparent. It usually felt a need to guard itself from others with anger, criticism, judgment, cynicism, and suspicion – even humor.:) And then of course there was also apathy and detachment. For a long time I have felt there was a hole in my Heart where love should be, but I recognize lately that love lives deeply inside the hole, and often comes out unexpectedly – particularly in the moments of other people’s suffering – the collective human condition. I realize that feeling compassion for “the collective” is safe. It allows me to *feel* those Heart strings play, which may be the entryway into a more personal expression of the Heart one-to-one. This hidden Heart that deeply feels has always been here. I seem to remember her when she was young and innocent, and expressed more easily. But she went into hiding. And sometimes she surprises me (and everyone else) when she comes out! Who *is* this that *feels* this – this – “love” ?! Oh my – the Heart is shining through! Quick I need some sunglasses!

I have noticed her coming out several times lately – especially with my blog friends who will always have a special place in my Heart. Then last week, when I was leaving a parking lot, I noticed there had been a rather bad accident at the entry/exit driveway, which necessitated my finding a different exit. As I wound my way through the parking lot I kept looking over to see what I could see – a lot of people milling around in no apparent distress, a police car and fire truck, and a car that had been broad-sided by a pick-up truck – ouch. I was surprised by the well-up of emotion inside. My Heart opened and I felt compassion for the people involved. It was uncontrived and undemonstrative. It was a spontaneous Heart response to the experience of people in fear, shock and trauma.

Now, just so you don’t get the wrong impression, I am not oozing love here. This Heart softening somehow hasn’t yet embraced certain unnamed family members who still manage to push my buttons. But hey, one step at a time, right? I mean, I’m no saint – or yogi – or guru – or…. There are people who, and situations that, still irritate, chafe and send me into the gnarly-snarlies… But we won’t go into that right now. I rather enjoy this Heart softening at the moment, feeling the freedom that is beginning to dance here. There is a living inspiration here in this Heart that opens softly and gently to touch and *feel* life dance in all its forms – loving it!

~*~

“Your task is not to seek for love,

but merely to seek and find

all the barriers within yourself

that you have built against it.”

Rumi

~*~

The photo is the center of a quilt wall hanging that my mother made.

It reminded me of a window with 4 panes…

A Heart quilt window…