Nature's Balance...

Monday I was startled out of meditation by a loud BANG against the house or window.  I wasn’t sure which.  So I came out of meditation and hollered up to my husband to see if it had been him.  He replied: No, I thought it was you!  In my head I responded - and you didn’t come running!? lol J

Upon investigation I spotted the Hawk outside, just under a window, standing on its dead prey – a Morning Dove.  It sat there and sat there looking around for several minutes with its intense eyes, as if vigilantly watching for a way of escape.  And then it took off with its prey, landing only a few feet away on the patio, and then hopped its way under some big juniper bushes with its catch in its talons.  It was there nearly an hour before it took off again, leaving behind a pile of feathers. 

 Our initial response was one of shock and sadness.  Nature’s way seems cruel at times, from our limited human perspective.  It was a startling sight to see for sure, as well as sobering.  We romanticize about nature and animals being so innocent, so pure, giving them human-like qualities.  But they are only being true to their nature, their inherent survival nature.  We were reminded that what we witnessed *is* the balance of Nature – life and death – the natural cycle of life.  Of course.  It is the way of things…  DH and I had been reflecting on the need for acceptance of the way of things over the weekend.  That through acceptance of what is, we can come into an inner space of peace and balance with life.   It is so easy to come out of this balance with life, to resist the way of things, and consequently suffer – emotionally and otherwise.  The Hawk and Dove incident was just a small reminder of the precarious balance between life and death, as well as the relationship between acceptance and suffering.  I found the symbolism quite interesting as well – a Hawk and a Dove – a bird of peace and a bird of prey...   The balance of Nature.

 It’s the paradox of fragility and stability,

vulnerability and power,
form and formless,
and learning to live

the fragile nature of the balance…

~

Photo of Hawk and Dove taken through the window
by DH

~

The stone balance on the pedestal is the
same one I did on Feb. 8th.
Amazingly it's still standing,
after a couple of good snowfalls
and wind -
except for the "bird's" topknot...

The Joy of Spontaneity

Last Friday I was surprised by unexpected joy – aliveness – an inner dance of Light and lightheartedness. Unfortunately I haven’t had time to write about it until Now :). I felt an inner excitement that I know all too well comes and goes, just like the sad feelings, or any other for that matter – but I was delighted and amused by this feeling of spontaneous joy rising. Honestly, sad to say, it doesn’t happen that often. I do not have what might be considered a “joyful” outlook on life. :) In fact my mother called me “the dark cloud” most of my childhood. So an effusion of “joy” is not normally expressed here – we were not a band of “joyful souls.” There was a darker cloud that loomed over us, and it wasn’t mine. But I’ll spare you that story. Suffice it to say, there wasn’t an environment that nurtured joy. So when it arose within me I *knew* it had to come from a place of pure Being deep within.

It seemed to me that by honoring and giving space for the sadness to express the day before, it freed the space up for joy to spontaneously arise. I think the same is true with all our shadow aspects – our “darker” feelings. When they are acknowledged and recognized, it frees them, releases their hold on us, and opens the door for the heart to play - spontaneously…

Everything became spontaneous; every action, every idea, thought, movement – eliciting a sense of joy. I spontaneously went for a 2 hour walk at 12 noon, which I never do; didn’t think about it, just did it, and rediscovered a new place to walk and take pictures. I had driven over to my “regular” walking path, but there were two huge dump trucks blocking the road to the parking area, and many cars were already trapped there, waiting for the trucks to move, so I decided not to chance it. Feeling a little bummed that my moment of joy was about to wane, I spontaneously remembered there was a little park right near our house. So I went there, with anticipation and curiosity.

This inner joy thrived in my new surroundings as I walked down winding concrete walking paths through a small, tree-filled park with a small pond, manicured gardens still in bloom. As I strolled along with my new friend, Joy, taking it in, I spotted a big yellow and black butterfly fluttering around one of the round gardens that happened to be quite fragrant. I have no idea what those little pink flowers are, but they were potent. I tried to get a picture, but the butterfly’s wings just kept fluttering and “he/she” wouldn’t sit still – of course. She was just doing what a butterfly does – thoroughly enjoying herself. She moved from flower to flower and I’d chase after it trying to capture “the moment”, leaning into the flowers as far as I could, camera extended, to get the right shot, and she’d move on to the next blossom, and me with her - trying to keep up with her joyful dance. I was in the moment *with* her – completely focused, although having trouble keeping the camera focused on her. Somehow magically I managed a couple of fairly good shots! The dragonfly was more cooperative, as I caught him resting on a stem.

I thought of how contemplative photographers must be soooo patient, so mindful, so still, just waiting for just the right moment to snap the shutter; skills I have yet to learn – particularly patience and contemplative photography. I was having too much fun playing with Joy to be patient! I completely lost myself in the experience, in the fun of it, in the presence of nature’s joy. Life should be like this everyday – a nurtured sense of natural Joy! For some I know it is… It is our natural state of Being after all… But it seems to come more naturally for some…

Even in this new Now today - new day, new feelings - I remember how I *in*-joyed the experience whole-heartedly – spontaneously. Spontaneously knew when it was time to leave, and spontaneously went about the rest of my day – in an uncontrived, natural state of joy... I could say my entire being was purely joy-ing that day. :) Yes, I know, it’s called enjoying… I did that too…

Remember Joy!

Life Just Keeps Happening...

Listening to the rain at the window,
trying to calm this frazzled body
after another week in the “family vortex.”

Listening to the sound of the rain come and go,
as storms roll through,
one after another this night…

The rain hits the large zucchini leaves in the neighbor’s garden,
tick, thunk, tick…
and the metal downspout,
clink, plank, clink…
Delightful sounds ~

I watch lightening streak through the sky,
cutting through the clouds;
dancing a beautiful light show.

Life just keeps happening…

That’s what nature teaches me -
Life just keeps happening no matter what.
It always amazes me how nature just keeps being itself.
The world keeps grinding on, despite what’s going on in our personal lives;
or physical bodies.

Life just keeps happening…

Although sometimes I feel like my body is caught in a grinder,
being pulverized by life…

So I come to sit at the window at night to regain a sense of Self,
to come back to nature for a bit of rejuvenation;
to sit in Silence of ‘The Beloved’

Life just keeps happening…

It seems the “remedy” for this helter-skelter life I’m living is awareness –
just stopping –
being aware of nature –
the sights, the smells, the sounds;
aware of the Life that is living here;
aware of the Silence that breathes me…

And rest ~

Deep rest ~

Doing nothing ~

Just Being ~

Just listening ~

to Life happening.

~

Storms roll through…

The family vortex spins…

And Life just keeps happening…


~ ♥ ~


Mystic Meandering
copyright
July 2011


Art: Bee Vortex

I actually did this one several weeks ago
but it seemed fitting for this post.
It is a combination of a couple of colors
but one in particular kept dragging,
creating these splotches,
giving it a rather
hectic look,
like a vortex of bees…

Or maybe that’s just my
projection at the moment :)

Hibernating Land...

Frozen Earth bound in time,
preparing for the thaw,
allowing flow and movement
to regain rhythm and rhyme…

Frozen streams of frosted glass
crystallize the sun;
forming lances of light to illuminate
the path,
through this natural prism,
opaquely wrapped.

The silence of the hibernating land
speaks in loud whispers
through the trees;
crying soul-callers of the sky
fly in comfortable bands,
sounding the homing call,
kindredly clanned.

Come Home
Be Free...



Mystic Meandering
copyright
January 1998


photo - sun through frost on window
Feb. 2010

Heron Wisdom

Heron was a kind of totem for me about 9 years ago. She first showed up when I was dealing with the break up of two very close female friendships in one year. I would go out on walks in my favorite area, sit on the grass and seek “counsel” from Nature. One day as I was sitting, I happened to look up and saw a Great Blue Heron flying overhead. I took it as a sign, my “message” from Nature, if you will. Heron has been showing up off and on ever since.

“Nature meditation” is different from sitting meditation in that awareness seems to be more acute, more vivid, involving more of the senses. It becomes an experience of breathing in the sights, sounds and smells: seeing, noticing, observing, connecting. It’s when I *feel* the alive Stillness of Life humming around me. I automatically take huge deep breaths as I cross over the foot bridge to the pathway, breathing in the aliveness – entering a refuge. It’s where I relax, slow down, and feel open and receptive at a different level than in sitting meditation. As I start each walk I ask “Spirit” (how I refer to the inner Life of everything) to “speak” to me through Nature today – to reveal the Truth of a situation. Sometimes she does and sometimes she doesn’t. But usually it’s in subtle ways – through things that catch my attention along the way. And so I become aware. I notice. I look. And I wait. Yesterday I asked for a “sign” about our current situation.

As I passed by the little wild life habitat pond I scanned the edges curious to see if there was a Heron. I was actually hoping I’d see one – but nothing. I kept walking and then on the return trip scanned the pond again. Nothing. I took in the sight of the reflection in the pond, and the sound of the red winged black birds chirping in the low overgrowth along the edge, and kept walking. And then, as I was nearly past the pond, out of the corner of my eye I saw her coming in low over the pond – wings outstretched, gliding in. My heart leapt. I didn’t see her land, so I turned and walked back to see if I could find her. As quickly as I had seen her, I lost her. I went down the embankment and scanned around the edges of the pond to see if I could see where she might be. Eventually I spotted her across the pond perched on a tangle of branches.

I stood still and watched her as she sat looking into the murky water. Then I started to move closer to the edge of the pond, to get a better look. I may have even uttered a few sounds. My attempt to “connect.” As I moved she saw me. Even from across the pond it evidently disturbed her and she took off, climbing slowly and gracefully overhead. Darn I thought, if I had just stayed still, observing and quiet. If I hadn’t tried to move toward, hadn’t tried to grasp at the experience. My messenger was gone. And yet I knew she was the message: Stand still, watch and observe. Sometimes it’s better not to make a move, but stand in stillness. Movement too soon can cause unnecessary disturbances. Good advice for my present drama… :) Stand and wait…

Herons have great symbolism in many different cultures. When Heron first made herself known to me many years ago, the wisdom that she brought me then was to stand on my own, to follow the call of my Heart, to seek my own wisdom, my own counsel, and follow my own way, not the path of others.

And now she seemed to be saying – wait in stillness – don’t act too soon - don’t move too quickly - be “stillness waiting…” Wise Heron. Nature always shows you the Truth…

~*~