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sometimes inspiring, sometimes personal meanderings of the Heart's opening in the every-day-ness of Life...

Monday, September 28, 2009

Forgotten Joy

Yesterday morning I awoke with the usual contraction in the pit of my stomach – my habitual response to life these days, as a result of the *story* I keep creating in my head about what is happening. Then I consciously brought my awareness to the space of Awareness, as I breathed into the contraction, meeting it, while at the same time laying back into the inner felt sense of Being – aware, once again, that it was my thoughts that were churning my stomach into a large knotted ball…

After several minutes, still aware of the knot, I arose and went through my usual morning routine and checked emails before heading to the kitchen to make breakfast. I receive the frequent mailings from Non-Duality Highlights which have various quotes and excerpts from various “non-duality” teachers. The first two entries were about Fear and Anxiety, my life long companions. Interesting, but the words didn’t particularly speak to me, so I kept reading down and came to the last entry, which was a link to a YouTube video entitled: “Where the hell is Matt?” I was curious so I clicked on the link.

Now you may have already heard about this guy who’s going all over the world for the purpose of dancing in every city that he goes to – why, I don’t know, although I did recently see a program about him. So as soon as the video started playing I recognized who this was. But I wasn’t prepared for my reaction. For some reason it touched me as I sat watching, amused, while he danced by himself in streets, and deserts, and flower fields. As the video musically transitioned from scene to scene he was eventually joined by crowds of people, all dancing their funny little dances – smiling, happy, laughing, joyful. My heart began to smile and my eyes began to well up at the sight of people joyfully dancing with him all over the world: Children and adults in back streets and on beaches, on mountain cliffs and bridges, in sun and rain – expressing pure joy. As the tears began to fill my eyes, the simple presence of Joy began to fill my heart and it surprised me. It was a forgotten joy. The knot in my stomach began to dissolve and my heart began to lighten. Amazing. I didn’t have to work on unraveling it. It unwound itself while I watched pure joy playing out on the computer screen.

In a 4+ minute video I *felt* what is underneath all the fixations and fears, the rapids and turbulence that I’ve been experiencing lately: the Joy of our True Nature. It was waiting right there. You can call it Pure Consciousness, Compassion, Awareness, Happiness, Contentment, or whatever you name it – it’s the same energy that underlies everything we experience – even if we can’t feel it at the time. It’s Being being Joy!

This one man on a mission to dance in cities around the world, for whatever reason, unknowingly lit up my heart with a remembrance of Forgotten Joy that has been hiding underneath the stories of the fearful rapids of living, which now don’t seem so frightening. As Pema Chodron says – all life is workable. Who knows, I may even become adventurous and learn to *enjoy* the rapids… chuckle, chuckle, chuckle.

As I went about my day I noticed I felt lighter, freer, unburdened, and I caught myself several times humming the theme song from The Lion King, trying to remember the lyrics – something about the Circle of Life. Everyone and everything is part of the Circle. It’s all one Life energy rising and falling, contracting and expanding – the fear *and* the joy. Everything held in the Circle…

Here’s the link for the dancing video in case you want a heart smile today. :)

2 comments:

  1. great photo, great post! what is that picture. you know I just felt uplifted reading your post. I needed that. Sometimes I feel like I'm just slogging through life. I have seen Matt before. Maybe I should check him out again!

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  2. Thanks! Glad it uplifted you. You know, sometimes it's the Beatles' 'Let it Be' and sometimes it's a silly little video and lyrics from a cartoon movie! :)
    The heart picture is some kind of a synthetic opalescent/iridescent heart that I bought many years ago. I laid it on top of a small white Christmas tree light that is part of a string of lights that winds through some items on a shelf. It gave it this beautiful golden hue.
    Heart Hugs :)

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