Incubating Love...

Love was not a language spoken in my family growing up.  Consequently, I do not *see* myself as a particularly “loving” person – in the sense of being demonstrative in my expressions of love.  An astrologer once told me that I probably found it easier to express anger than to express love, as she read my astrology chart.  Sad but true…  We can blame it on the stars J LOL… 

But – L~O~V~E has been knocking on my door again lately, trying to get me to open and cross the threshold…  I can feel the Heart space subtly awakening, and natural, more spontaneous expressions of Love are coming through…  I assure you that expressions of love here have always been genuine! But there has been a shift to another space of Love now.  I hope you know what I’m saying here…

I certainly understand that from an “enlightened” point of view “Love” *is* our True Nature (Divine Nature). And I am learning the *essence* of that “Love” through my “spiritual process” – opening to that Divine space of Love within more and more fully - awakening to the flower of the Divine Self – the Lotus in the Heart…

Yesterday I tapped into a boat load of love listening to the *crazy* Happy Song by Pharrel Williams on YouTube – dancing through the house - feeling love for Life arising from the core once again.  You kinda have to be in the mood to listen to this :~) but love comes in many disguises.  And it's the *vibration* of happiness that it creates inside that matters... 

Love was also recently inspired in me by a beautiful blog post by Aarathi Selvan called“Love is the background to it all.”  Please do check it out.  Her post is what inspired me to post Make a Journey of Love.  In her post she says that Love is the “background” for everything, and asks us to change our perspective, to see life as a “journey of love” – to find those things in life that invoke love within us.  That is the journey I wish to be on now – to become more aware of and open to the experience of a deeper Love that lies within; the Love that infuses all Life, that is the Ground of all Existence.  And so I have been journaling about what invokes Love within me each day for the last 8 days.  I like the word “invoke” as it implies what calls Love forth, what awakens that inner sense of Love in us…  Not surprisingly I found it is the simple things of life – like a flower. 

With the blooming of the Amaryllis, before my recent illness, I unexpectedly tapped into that quiet space of love…   I found myself feeling a “love connection” to the Amaryllis blossoms.  I would talk to them each morning in soothing cooing sounds, stroking the long stem with tender loving strokes, being present to the flower in a quiet act of giving and receiving love.  How easy it was to open the Heart to a flower!  Or was it the flower opening my Heart!?  Ahhhhh - I think that was it…  J

Maybe this is what Love really is: an unguarded open quiet space of Presence – experiencing and expressing the *vibration* of Love that is there; meeting life and people from this quiet space of energetic Love that just is.  Love is not something that can be conjured up, or forced – but its vibration can be *felt.*

There is a vibration of Love “incubating” within.  And I am allowing myself to *feel* and *expand* into that space.  Unconditional love does not come from the “ego”, the mind, the personality, or “practice” – but through awareness of the quiet space of Inner Beingness; the cocoon of the Heart, where we draw Love from – the elixir of Life ItSelf.

Have you hugged a plant today? J

~*~

Excerpt from: “The Heart”
by Jeff Foster

“The heart is an unlimited room
There is always enough room
for the contents of this moment.
The highest joy,
the deepest agony,
thoughts that won’t stop spinning.
The heart can hold it all.
Embrace is all it knows.
Space is its nature.
It needs no time.
It asks nothing.
It gives everything in return.
It is home...

for all those lost parts of yourself
for all the abandoned pieces
of the puzzle of ‘you.’

They gave you a name
before you were named.
And that name was Love…”

Make a Journey of Love...

Make your journey to be a journey of Love,

for all is Love…

Open daily to Love.
It is always there,
always available…

Make yourself available
to Love

Feel Love’s Presence
carrying you…

Each day step into
the channel
of Love’s call…

It is time to see things new -
through innocence and Love…
Despite the pains and frustrations,
wounds and traumas
that are emerging
through the physical body
and collective body.

Embrace it all in Innocence…

This is the lesson:

To see Love in everything.
It is the Divine Truth of all things…

The deep change you need comes through/from
the confluence of Love within you…
Pay attention to its flow,
its music,
its message:

There is nothing but Love.

It is your destiny to BE Love

from which you came
and which you are…

It is your Truth and your Substance…

Let the seeds of Love grow within you
to blossom and flower into its fullness.

It is already there in your Heart -
in the core of your Being.

~*~

This is the same Amaryllis plant from my previous post.
The light from the sun showing through the petals
gives it this yellow tinge and glow.  It also
actually had little sparkles on the petals
which I couldn’t capture with my camera…

The Amaryllis plant is a symbol for many things
one of which is opening to the infinite expansiveness of Love

giving the strength to dance intimately with Life
 and speak from the Heart
with clarity and compassion…

~*~

Verses under photos are from my
meditative writings
2004-2006

IN-spirations...

After two weeks I am finally breathing easier ~ ~ ~
Wanted to share these "in-spirations"
and the beautiful Amaryllis blossom
that bloomed while I was ill... ;)

The Miracle of Pure Existence – Fred LaMotte

“The greatest service I can perform is to inspire…
Gently shift your attention from what is happening
 to that space it happens in -
the SPACE of Existence…

Existence itself is a miracle!
Whatever happens in this Existence is insubstantial,
 ever changing,
never better or worse,
worth neither to be grasped or rejected…

The space in which this world is happening,
the air of pure Existence,
is complete,
overflowing with joy,
and utterly divine.
The space is without taint or boundary.
It is motionless, silent and self-luminous.

Usually our attention is absorbed by what is happening,
and so we lose the simple innocent awareness of
the Existence in which it happens.
Existence becomes the background to the play of forms
that rise and change and disappear.
But in the awakened view,
which is the clearest simplest view,
Existence becomes the foreground,
and the forms of the world sink into the background.

…into the still boundless space of

Existence…

The greatest miracle is
the gift of Existence.

At every moment,
the answer to any problem
is to just observe
the dance of
Existence”

Fred LaMotte

~*~

Trust In Life! – Jeff Foster

“Don’t judge your sorrow too quickly or too harshly, friend.
Honouring the darkness within is not the same as ‘wallowing’,
and cultivating deep trust in all of life’s movements does not
equate to self-indulgence or a ‘pity party.’

Please do not misunderstand this.

Find a space in your heart for the
unwanted,
the unloved,
the rejected
aspects of experience.

If we refuse to plumb the depths
we are left only half alive,
however ‘enlightened’ we claim to be.
Artists, musicians, poets
of all cultures throughout the ages
have understood this.

See your life as an art gallery, friend.
Embrace the full spectrum of experience,
from the light to the dark.
Hold it all in your prayers,
illuminate it all with the light of
loving awareness.

Be that awareness!

Perhaps your sorrow is there to remind you
of the joy that is about to burst forth.

Perhaps the contraction you feel
in your body is about to give way
to glorious expansion.
Perhaps your frustration
just wants to frustrate itself fully
and be felt, fully.

Perhaps this moment contains
no mistake!

Perhaps the relief you will feel
in time will be infinitely sweeter
for having suffered so deeply.
Perhaps your suffering is
teaching you
humility,
gratitude,
quietude,
and
compassion
- and trust -
unbreakable trust
 in life’s strange processes.

Don’t judge your sadness,
your depression,
your feelings,

[your illness]…

And don’t judge
the process of another,
for you really don’t know
what’s best for anyone,
and you really don’t know
more than life itself.

That which you reject
(in another or yourself)
may actually be
much-needed medicine,
a misunderstood teacher,
inviting you to an
awakening
deeper
than
you
ever
thought
possible.

It may be a threshold
guardian,
a gatekeeper
of a forgotten
kingdom.

Oh,
the glory of
a life
fully
felt!

And to your demons,
say –

Namaste!”

Jeff Foster

~*~

These quotes inspired me during
my recent illness.
As usual I put them in the form of a poem,
but they were not written as poetry,
although they seem like poetry to me  :)

B's San Diego Trip - Seaport Photos...

While I continue to ride this wave on the Ocean of Life, progressively *improving* from this lung condition, thanks to all your wonderful well-wishes and healing energies both publicly and through emails, and the vibrational waves J, I thought I would share some of the best photos of B’s recent business trip to San Diego, Calif., taken with his Kindle!  Some are just stunning… inspiring… and some offer a view into a lifestyle *we* seldom see! - and will *never* live ourselves, nor would we want to! J I’m no ascetic, we live comfortably, and am not about to renounce the world, but this is a little over the top!  As B called it: a kind of “valley girl” way of life - the emphasis on the façade and image.  Here’s to “the good life!” LOL

Hotel Towers

Hotel Lobby

Hallway

We now step out of the posh fantasy façade
into another unreal world:

B’s Bungalow J

Note the 70’s “beach boy bungalow” feel
to the décor with the funky furniture.

For a mere 200+/night…
All that’s missing is the surfboard! LOL

View from B’s room

Touring the Seaport Village

Seaport Village with Hotel

Seaport Village at Night

Seaport Village with Plant

Boats, Boats, Boats

Pedal Pushers

Sally’s

 Fish and chips - $52!!!!

Lael’s
at the Hotel

Breakfast - $31

 Burgers - $15

Sunset Over Harbor

Free :)

And finally - the lovely Harbor Night Lights

“Seaport” at Night

Hotel at night across Harbor

Pneumonia...

A week of Pneumonia has brought me to my knees – only to find a grey emptiness and lifelessness, finding myself to be an empty shell of a woman.  Just a body in pain, discomfort and very aware of the absence of spirit.  I can’t even “spiritualize” it, or make it sound “spiritual.”  No words of wisdom rise to the surface.  I have never experienced anything like it before.  I am entirely focused on the body mechanism itself and my inability to function.  Just making it through each day.   I am unable to read or meditate, only pray…

Twice to the doctors this week.  Throwing up the antibiotics he prescribed, being told I may have to go to the hospital.  Loss of appetite – two days of bread and water.  Seemingly robbed of health and a sense of Divine Spirit that supposedly animates this body, that I have so come to rely on, yet can’t seem to locate.  Only grey emptiness…

To make matters worse B has been away for 4 days on a business trip.  He will thankfully be home tonight. 

Today I just sat and cried – thinking of all the people in the world who are truly suffering from illness and disease, especially in poverty stricken countries – with no one to truly love them, or care for them. Feeling a bit "abandoned" myself...  How they suffer for lack of love…

May we all know deep love in our lives – the love that heals, that sustains and gives us breath…  I've come to the conclusion that this is really the only thing that heals - Divine Love

Hubby's Passion :)

Ever since B started his new job last November I have been seeing more of this:

And this:

And this:

He loves his job, for which we are grateful, and has been putting in a lot of his own time.  At 62 he feels he has finally found his “dream job.”  Good thing! J  I feel his contentment, his dedication, and commitment.  It inspires me…  At 64 I know what my deep passion is…  I just don’t know how to make it my life’s work… Do they pay Mystics? J

A couple of weekends ago B created this low tech (on purpose),  hands-on, interactive, communication tool (below) to help inspire the people on his team to *engage* in dialogue and discussion – making the long scroll by hand.  It took him at least 8 hours to create, and was evidently a big hit, as it spawned many “workshop” like meetings to clarify and hone the direction of the work project.

His passion is not in making the scroll obviously, or even in working in the corporate world again, but is to facilitate people, particularly with regards to a business environment, to find their vision and direction, to bring clarity to the bigger picture, using his mutli-dimensional technical expertise.  That has always been his passion.  And after many years of honing his professional skills and gathering personal wisdom, he feels he now has the wisdom to put what he loves into practice in a business environment.  How often do you hear of that happening at this age!

And so I would imagine I am going to see a lot more of this:

And this:

And even this again: J

 How about you?

What is your life’s passion?
  And how are you making it your life’s work?

Winter's Light...

And yet, though we strain against the deadening grip
of daily necessity,
I sense there is this mystery:

All life is being lived.

Who is living it then?

Is it the things themselves,
or something waiting
inside them,
like an unplayed melody
in a flute?

Is it winds blowing over the waters?

Is it the branches that signal to each other?

Is it flowers
interweaving their fragrances,
or streets
as they wind through time…

Rainer Maria Rilke
from: Book of Hours

~*~

Yes, we are still in Winter here! J
March is our snowiest month,
along with temps in the 60’ and 70’s!

Top photo: Snow on Trees color inverted…

The photos below were taken by my husband the morning after,
out the back window...

  How magical the pristine beauty that emerged….

”The Mystery” is here,
everywhere,
in everything,

*as* everything…

In looking into “The Mystery”
there is a sense of intimacy.
There is only
deep, deep Love

reflected back…

In the deep Womb of the Heart
there is a song…
It is sung with tenderness
for every heart that aches
from its imagined separateness
from The Beloved…

Sit in deep Quiet and listen
until you hear It…

~

Verses under photos
Mystic Meandering

The Joy of Rain!

Some of you may think that I spend a little too much time in the ethers, floating in the Cosmos with the planets and stars… J  I can assure you that is not true.  Well actually, we are all floating in the Cosmos of planets and stars on a planet suspended in space.  We just *think* the earth is all there is… LOL J  This morning it was raining on my part of planet earth. And it brought such *delight*!  It brought joy to my Heart and lifted my Spirit.   It was an innocent, playful JOY I had not felt in a long time.  I know some of the world has been getting too much rain, and there are floods, and people have lost homes and been misplaced as a result. And for that I feel sadness and compassion.  And some of you are tired of seeing white all winter long that has caused so much havoc over the south and east.  But here in semi-arid Colorado we haven’t been getting much all winter, except in the mountains.

So when I looked out the window and saw the pavement wet with rain this morning, my heart leaped with JOY!  There’s something “inviting” about rain. It wants you to come play… 

It’s been ages since we’ve had RAIN!  I grew up in New England where we had rainy, wet Springs and I miss it – the *sound* and smell of wetness.  It opens me up and makes me more *aware* of Life!  It has a sound you know – the swish under the tires of passing cars, the patter on my jacket, the clopping of my shoes on wet pavement. And then there’s the exhilerating cool wet feeling on my parched skin, and the earthy smell of moisture filling my dry nostrils, and the movement and fluidity that it creates.

 Just wetness!

I realized today just how much my spirit *needs* it. 

And so I put my play clothes on, and took myself on a little excursion.

I rode around in the rain, until it turned to snow, snapping some photos with my *regular* camera.  I don’t have a camera on my old clunky cell phone.  But I quickly saw how one becomes *distracted* trying to drive and use a camera!!!  Not a good idea… J

It's better if you wait until you're stopped at a light :)

Anyway, here is a link to a poem I wrote several years ago after some rain.   May you find what makes your Heart sing! – no matter what the weather… J

*NOTE* - Top photo is from a greeting card and is copyrighted by
Chris Jones, The Borealis Press 1997

The Womb of Infinity...

Love’s longing brings me to the door
of the Divine
where there is only
the Infinity of Existence,
the Spaciousness
of
LIFE
ItSelf

awake
and
alive

I am called into that “Cosmic Womb”
again, and again...
the womb
of
Infinity

An invitation to enter
the

Q
u
i
e
t

Surrendering

I
enter
the Silence

just
listening

becoming aware
of
Divine Presence

awakening
to
Infinite
Consciousness

recognizing
the
Primal Unity
that is
Here

finding repose

~

Mystic Meandering

March 4, 2014

~

Photo: Rainbow Light
Reflected on Wall
Radially Blurred